To Be a House Elf
by OtherwiseKnownAsOli
Summary: Hermione Granger is officially fed up with people shunning her idea of SPEW. She decides to collaborate with a well known redheaded set of twins to come up with a prank that no Hogwarts student will ever forget. Who knows what'll happen. HG.GW
1. Spew Crew Spats

This is my first ever fic and I hope you will all enjoy it. The beginning is kinda boring but it gets better, I promise!

Chapter 1: Spew Crew Spats

Hermione Granger barged down the halls toward the Gryffindor common room dangerously close to tears. Nobody in the entire school seemed to realize that the school was cleaned, fed and slaved over by hundreds of little slaves who were brainwashed to believe they were happy.

She had started S.P.E.W. but that idea had been shunned by her friends and peers. The bushy haired witch sunk heavily into a cushy red armchair by the roaring fire. She frowned slightly and anger burned in her eyes as she recounted her miserable day.

FLASHBACK 

Hermione walked past the house tables watching her peers help themselves to breakfast. Surely they didn't realize that they were shoveling into their mouths, the fruits of the house elves' labor. She turned past the Slytherin house table and spotted Lavender Brown and Parvati Patil chatting animatedly about the latest robe styles they had seen recently at Madam Malkin's.

"Hey Lavender! Parvati!" She called (rather loudly now that she recalled it) "Wanna join S.P.E.W?" Hermione rattled her box of S.P.E.W badges eagerly in anticipation. "S.P.E.W. is a nonprofit organization designed to help promote the rights of house elves," she recited.

Lavender and Parvati stared at her like she had just stripped naked and proclaimed her undying love for Snape. After a moments pause Parvati said gently as if she were talking to an idiot, "Hermione? In case you didn't realize, the house elves enjoy working here at Hogwarts. Can't you see that they just don't want freedom?"

"But they are brainwashed and uneducated!" Hermione yelled indignantly. "They don't know freedom is good because they've never had it."

Draco Malfoy approached along with Blaise and Crabbe. "Well if it isn't Mudblood and the spew crew," he smirked icily.

"It's S.P.E.W!" she shrieked

"And we're not in the 'spew crew' thank you very much," Lavender retorted, "Sorry 'Mione, house elf rights aren't exactly on my list of priorities." She and Parvati walked back to their seats at the Gryffindor table concerned once again only with shopping, clothes and makeup. They left, unknowingly leaving poor Hermione to deal with three menacing Slytherins on her own.

"So," Malfoy sneered, "You're planning to attempt to set the house elves free? How noble" with that he snatched Hermione's box of badges and tossed it casually into the air. "Dynosarium," he whispered coolly and the contents of the small tin box exploded into charred bits of cloth and rubble. Crabbe guffawed and clapped stupidly while Malfoy and Blaise looked smugly at Hermione.

"You evil little ferret," she yelled at him, " I spent hours designing those!"

"So what?" he spat "Purebloods are meant to be served and obeyed by all lesser creatures, but I suppose you wouldn't know that now would you? Mudblood."

Before Hermione could hex him, he turned and swept away as Blaise knocked the young witch over with a heavy blow to her ribs. She staggered away clutching her side in angry tears of pain.

END FLASHBACK 


	2. Elf phobia?

Kinda short chapter… sorry.. they will get longer though

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Chapter 2: Elf-phobia?

"What's up Hermione!" Ron asked cheerfully, his arms filled with breakfast leftovers. "Oh," He realized, as he saw the pained expression on his best friend's face. "What happened 'Mione?" Harry asked softly.

"It's nothing, really I'm fine," Hermione mumbled. "It was stupid of me to think anyone cared anything for the poor, mistreated slaves that serve us. They're all just a bunch of selfish jerks!" she cried savagely under her breath. "But I will make them listen, they will realize the error of their ways," she promised to no one in particular.

Harry and Ron stares at her but waited patiently as their friend often rambled on about house elf rights. After a few more well worded mutterings, Hermione realized Ron and Harry were still watching and looked up expectantly at them.

"Er… Right you are Hermione," Ron choked out desperately at her unwavering stare, "Uhh… I've gotta go free a house elf .. or .. errr… emm… go to the bathroo-…Er. Free an elf… in the bathroom?" He stammered his cheeks flushing red as his hair. "Uhh cheerio then. Bye!" He dashed out of the room leaving a bewildered Hermione and a disgusted Harry.

"He really doesn't like house elves does he?" Hermione sighed sadly.

"No.. not since the time I got Dobby to hide in the shower," Harry chortled, "I will never forget that. Haha- good times… good times. He'll come round eventually though." Hermione smiled slightly, Ron's fear of house elves was widely known throughout the Gryffindor House. It was a shame really. Harry skipped gawkily out of the portrait looking for Ron.

Hermione stared out the triple paned glass window and watched the reflection of the merry fire dance upon it. If only there was a way to convince everyone that house elves deserved better. She yawned widely as the orange flames warmed her entire body. The large cushy chair enveloped her within its many folds and she drifted away into a somewhat peaceful slumber.


	3. Plans, Letters, and Disturbing Images

_Okay heres another chapter !_

_I know i forgot to include a disclaimer for the first 2 chapters .. sorry.. so heres a disclaimer..._

_Disclaimer: I do not own any of JK Rowlings characters or story plots_

_Ok well hope you enjoy the new chapter!_

**Chapter 3: Plans, Letters and Disturbing Images**

"I've got it!" cried Hermione happily. She ran her hand through her tangled and bushy mess of hair and bounced up the stairs to the boy's dorm. "Harry, wake up!" she begged, "Harry! Harry!" she moaned exasperated. She paused then yelled the first thing that popped into her mind, "Harry! The dementors are coming and Snape's running around in his boxers!"

"Gahh!" screamed Harry, "The horrors! Bad images! Shield your eyes Hermione! I'll save you! He twisted wildly under the sheets and accidentally kicked the bedpost dumping himself unceremoniously on the hard wodden floor.

Hermione tried uselessly to stifle her laughter as Harry thrashed on the ground trying desperately to free himself from his blanket. He flung the aforementioned linen halfway across the dorm and glared at Hermione who was now also on the floor, blawling her eyes out as she doubled over in laughter.

Harry intensified his glare and waited for Hermione to finish. Approximately three minutes and twenty six seconds later, Hermione wiped the last tear of laughter from her cheek, but her brown eyes still glinted with mirth.

"May I inquire as to why you felt the urge to wake me up with sick and scary mental images at seven AM in the morning on a Saturday? A Saturday mind you!" He bellowed loudly.

Ron turned over slightly and muttered, "Cool it mate, I only burned half your Firebolt. See? You've still got the other hapf in perfect condition." Hermione giggled slightly behind her hand as Ron turned back over to reenter the dreamland realm.

"So- You were saying?" She asked Harry.

"Why'd you wake me up so early?" he growled.

"Oh yeah! Can I borrow Hedwig? She inquired.

"Yeah sure whatever. Just don't ever wake me up again… EVER!" he emphasized groggily as he climbed back into his four poster bed after retrieving the red and gold comforter.

Hermione darted back to her dorm, shrugged her school robes on over her pajamas and padded silently towards the portrait. She opened it and slipped through the halls and up the winding stairs to the owlery.

She entered and the stench of rodent carcasses and owl droppings met her sensitive nose. She disregarded it as nothing could ruin her brilliant plan.

Hermione pulled a folded piece of parchment along with a quill out of her voluminous pockets and scrawled a brief not to the two people her scheme depended on.

"Hedwig…" she crooned softly, "I've got a message for you to deliver." Hedwig flapped over and alighted drowsily on Hermione's shoulder blinking sleepily.

Hermione's slender hands worked quickly to affix the note to the owl's ankle. She fed Hedwig a crust of bread and the patient white owl nipped her affectionately before gliding out through the open window.

Hermione watched the winged messenger bob persistently through the turbulent winds until she was just a tiny snowflake in the distance. She shivered slightly as a gust of wind whirled around her, her robes threatening to break free of her slim form.

The young witch tugged her robes more tightly about herself and exited the owlery. She walked slowly, letting her robes billow out widely behind her, contemplating the answer her note would receive.

Her entire (evil maybe?) plot rested in the hands of these two (talented and special?) people. She herself would never have the time or resources available to her to carry out the scheme. She pondered quietly enjoying the rippling sensation that her robes caused around her ankles. In fact it was almost as if—

"Miss Granger!" an icy voice exclaimed behind her.

"Yes?" she answered primly as she spotted Snape approaching.

"What do you think you are doing?"

"Uhh… Walking professor?"

"In that?" he spat angrily indicating her pajamas with his pinkie

Hermione looked down and was mortified to see her skimpy and slightly sheer blue nightgown peeking innocently up at her.

"Er… woopsies?" she commented, drawing her robes more snugly around to cover the offending article of clothing. But her ankle length black robes could not hide the fact that she had simply, in her delight, forgotten to put on shoes.

"Well I'll have ten points from Gryffindor for inappropriate dress and another ten because I couldn't find my favorite pair of boxers this morning," Snape stated coldly. He spun on his heel and disappeared in a flash of black robes towards the Great Hall.

Hermione stood frozen in the middle of the empty hall in nothing but her robes and a nightgown, her eye twitching convulsively. She stayed frozen for another three seconds before shrieking "Bad images! Dirty images! Eww! Ewww! Ewwwwwwwww!" as she ran wildly back to the Gryffindor common room. She skidded to a halt before the Fat Lady and stopped to catch her breath.

"Pumpkin Pasty," she gasped as the portrait swung open to admit her.

The common room was just as she left it she realized happily. After all, she had just been gone fifteen minutes. She leapt up the stairs to choose an outfit, then entered the bathroom. She turned on the shower and let the soothing water wash her traumas away.

_well hope you liked that ..._

_more will be coming soon! bye!_


	4. We're Not Evil I Promise

_Okay ... chapter number four... sorry I would've gotten it uploaded yesterday only my internet wouldn't load_

Disclaimer: I dont own Harry Potter. okaay? ; )

Chapter 4: We're Not Evil- I Promise

As Snape was complaining to his disgusted student about his missing underwear, Molly Weasley was busy cooking breakfast for her husband, Arthur, and her sons, Fred, George and Bill, who had decided to visit for the weekend.

She waved her wand and the bacon sprang instantly into the frying pan and started to sizzle deliciously. Half a dozen eggs followed suit and flew across the room, egg whites trailing slightly behind the yolk, like the tail of a comet.

With a final flick of her wand, Mrs. Weasley caused the plates, forks, napkins, and glasses to arrange themselves neatly on the large dining table.

A heavenly aroma wafted upstairs from the kitchen to the bedroom that the two Weasley Twins shared.

"mmm," Fred mumbled, "wassat?"

At the sound of his voice, George bolted upright in bed, instantly smacking up against the wooden slats that held up Fred's bed overhead.

George cursed silently under his breath as he massaged his throbbing head.

"We really need to get mum to buy us new beds," he muttered to himself.

Their bunkbed had grown old and creaky and George was afraid that someday in the very near future, Fred would come crashing down on him as he slept. He glanced at his clock, 7:30 am. He then rolled out of bed and started shaking Fred.

"Fred, Fred! Wake up! We need to be in Hogsmead in fifteen minutes to set up the shop!" he yelled in his sleeping brother's ear. The bed wobbled precariously but Fred remained soundly asleep. Fred was not going to budge anytime soon so George, being the prankster he was, decided to take matters into his own hands.

He quietly loosened the screws that held the ancient bed together, then shook the entire frame until it rattled loudly then finally crashed in a heap on top of the bottom bunk.

"I'm up..." said Fred shakily getting up from the heap of splintered wood that was his bed. He left the room to get changed and George whispered "reparo," before exiting as well.

After a hearty breakfast, the twins apparated to their joke shop, which had recently replaced Zonko's.

George fished a gaudy silver key from his pocket and opened the door, while Fred switched the closed sign to open with a small flick of his wand. George was about to take his place behind the register when a large snowy owl flew into the shop, landing gracefully on a large pile of unopened boxes. George accepted the letter she offered him and unrolled it with a showy flourish. He read aloud….

_Dear Fred and George Weasley,_

_I was just wondering whether you would kindly help me in carrying out a sort of prank I'd like to pull. Do you think we could talk about it later today at the shop? Please send your answer back with Hedwig, and thanks so much!_

_Yours Truly,_

_Hermione Granger_

"You up to doing a little pranking?" Fred asked his brother.

"Since when am I not?" George snorted.

They both started laughing manically until they realized how many people were staring at them like they had just been transfigured into firebreathing merpeople with butterfly wings.

"Uhh…" George began, "We're not evil (or retarded)."

"Yeah," agreed Fred, watching the steady trickle of customers entering the shop, "I promise."

"Oh yeah like that's going to do a lot of good," George replied sarcastically.

They both scrabbled off the front desk which they had unknowingly climbed onto during their fit of laughter, and Fred grabbed a quill from beside the register.

_Dear Hermione,_

_We'd be delighted. Meet us here around noon._

_Sincerely,_

_Gred & Forge_

He scrawled quickly. George snatched it and read it over.

"You idiot!" You've misspelled our names again!" He took the large peacock quill and to fix their names, and then tied the reply to Hedwig's outstretched leg. The owl surged off the counter and back towards the castle.


	5. Gimme Back My Bacon

_Okay I know this chapter is reeeeeally short but the next one will definitely be longer... I just needed it separate because it has no place with the previous or upcoming chapter. _

Disclaimer: Okay I really dont own Harry Potter and my name is not JK Rowling and if you dont believe me... uhh... go away or something. (idk)

Chapter 5: Gimme Back My Bacon

Hermione sipped her pumkin juice in feverish anticipation. Students were alloed to go to Hogsmead today and depending on the twin's answer, she would hopefully be able to lay the foundations for her brilliant plan.

Suddenly, a huge cloud of feathers burst in through the high windows. The mail had arrived.

Hedwig dropped Hermione's letter in her lap, and stole a strip of bacon off Ron's fork before flying off towards the owlery.

"Hey!" Ron cried after the retreating bird, "Gimme back my bacon!"

Hedwig swooped mischievously over Ron's head and smacked him in the face with her claw.

"Ow," he cried, "Stupid bird!" He turned towards Hermione and Harry who were laughing their heads off at his misfortune.

"Haha, you were like gimme bacon, then Hedwig punched you! Haha! You were punched by a bird! That's hilarious!" Harry cried.

During the commotion that ensued this comment, Hermione took a moment to read the reply. Her mouth turned up in a small smile while a tiny glint of evilness flit quickly across her eyes.

Ron noticed this from the edge of his vision, but once he blinked, all he saw was Hermione quietly munching her toast, an innocent smile playing upon her lips.

He smacked Harry upside the head one more time, then took his place back at the table where he started to shovel bacon into his hungry mouth.

Hermione excused herself from the table and snuck quietly back to her dorm with the letter.


	6. Secret Meetings & False Emotions

_Okay here is the next chapter... slightly longer as promised..._

_I probably wont be updating until the beginning of January because I am visiting my relatives. But you never know, I might find an hour or two to type up the next couple of chapters. (yeah I know, I type really slow)_

_well I hope you enjoy this chapter, because I spent a really long time writing it: )_

disclaimer: If I owned Harry Potter (which I do not) he would get drunk on firewhiskey and parade in the slytherine common room wearing a yellow duckie bathrobe... hint hint hint (foreshadowing) hint hint

_haha do you get the hint? I think you do ... enjoy! _

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Chapter 6: Secret Meetings and False Emotions

The Golden trio lined up with their fellow students to go to Hogsmead. Their pockets jingled with coins ready to be spent on sweets (and in Hermione's case, books, quills, yadda yadda yaa, etc.)

They passed a vicious looking Filch and entered Hogsmead.

The three spent most of the morning inside Honeyduke's sampling the wide array of candy. By the time they decided to call it quits, Harry had accidentally eaten a vomit, a cowdung, and a sock flavored Bertie Bott's bean, and Ron had nearly burnt his tongue off with an acid pop.

They ambled out, Hermione walking in the center, laughing at their stupidity. She peeked at her watch and realized it was almost noon.

"Uhh.. Harry, Ron, Why don't you go on to the Three Broomsticks without me. I've gotta go pick up a new book I ordered from Flourish and Blotts" she lied.

"Okay," said Ron cheerily

"Err… I'll meet you back there in about twenty five minutes okay?" she replied.

Hermione walked slowly away until she was sure she was out of their sight, then ran quickly to the twin's shop.

"Why hello Hermione. To what do I owe this pleasure?" George asked in a honeyed voice.

"You got my note?" she inquired softly.

"Yeah," he replied in a whisper, "We'll talk in the back room, but lemme freak Lee out a little fir--"

He quickly shut up as Lee Jordan approached. "Heeeeyyy…" he said suspiciously, "Hermione never comes in here."

Err… right.." replied George feigning guiltiness, "but today, I needed her approval on a little spell I invented. So you see, that's why she's here standing before you." He concluded proudly. "Uhh, Lee? You wouldn't mind manning the register for a few minutes while I … er… go show Miss Granger here that er.. cough… cough… spell I mentioned?"

"Suuuurrre," Lee answered slowly, still not buying their story (which, may I remind you, was the whole point).

George winked slyly at Hermione and draped an arm protectively around her shoulders. He led her to the door of the storage room and shut it quietly behind him (still aware of Lee's gaze) where they both burst out laughing.

"Did you see his face!" George yelled loudly.

Fred popped up from behind a large box, "Whadd I miss? Whadd I miss?" he demanded.

"I made Lee think me and Hermione were coming in here for… erm.. other cough purposes .. cough cough."

The two pranksters yowled with laughter until Hermione realized something.

"Uhh .. Fred? George?" she asked, "Can't everyone hear what you just yelled (at the top of your voice I might add)?"

"Oh don't be silly," Fred replied, "We've soundproofed these walls ages ago… Before we bought the store even."

"Erm… Why would you want to do that?" Hermione inquired, mildly interested.

"Ehhh," stammered Fred, "That would be a … ehm… a long story… errr.. quite irrelevant… at this point in time…"

Hermione watched with growing interest as his ears turned red to match his hair. George decided to spare his brother the embarrassment and change the subject.

"So Hermione, what sort of pranking have you suddenly taken an interest in?" George asked

"Well," she began "You both know how I've been trying to convince people to see the injustices given to house elves."

"Hermione," Fred began, "For the last time…"

"We do not wish to join or partake in spew or spew's activities," The twins finished in monotone unison.

"It's S.P.E.W, and I wasn't going to ask you to!" Hermione retorted indignantly, "All I wanted to do was get your help and ideas for making a potion with which I could spike--"

"Wait.. Spike?" interrupted Fred gleefully, "as in slip a dangerous or occasionally lethal potion in an innocent person's drink all for the sake of our personal enjoyment?"

"Errr… whatever makes you happy?" Hermione agreed.

"Ooh ," grinned George, "I like the sound of this… Do continue Hermione."

Hermione smiled to herself and proceded to tell the pranksters of her plan. Ten minutes later, the three wrapped up their discussion.

"Okay, so we'll have your potion ready, give or take, in about a week from now," George estimated, "We just need time to look up the appropriate measurements and ingredients."

"Right!" said Fred, "and before you go back outside, remember that Lee still thinks you've been doing… er… other cough.. things.. cough. Personally, I think it'd be funny to leave it that way."

"I second the motion," replied George, his face deadly serious.

"How bout you 'Mione?"

"Yeah sure whatever," she joined in laughing cheerfully.

"Go do your thing you two crazy lovebirds!" Fred cheered wildly behind them, "But first," he smirked evily, "We've got to make it look as if something really did happen."

Fred mussed up their hair, loosened Hermione's robes, and totally rearranged George's so they were inside out. After a few more adjustments, Fred stood back and admired his handiwork.

A loud knock sounded on the door and Fred dove nimbly behind a few barrels.

"Just in time," he whispered to himself.

"George!" yelled Lee, "Are you still in there? I need three more boxes of puking pastilles, we're all out! Now I'm coming in there whether you're ready or not!"

He barged in to see Hermione and George fiddling frantically with their robes. George sprang up suddenly, "Here why don't I get those for you?" he said in an oddly falsetto voice. He rushed over to the barrels Fred hid behind and scooped several boxes out, making sure his twin stayed hidden from view.

He dumped the candies into Lee's arms and pulled Hermione roughly to her feet. Lee left muttering wildly to himself.

"Okay, lets make this good," whispered in Hermione's ear.

She smothered her laughter behind her hand as they walked out from the spacious closet.

George slid his arm around her waist and she followed suit to Lee's horror.

"Hermione," he began in a deep voice (rather loudly too), "You will come again next week wont you?"

"Of course I will," Hermione replied coyly, glancing slightly at Lee, "You are such a wizard with spells, George Weasley, that I could come back every week of my life!" Lee stared at them speechless (Luckily, it was around lunchtime and no one else was present).

"I do try my best," George declared proudly, " So I will see you in a week my dearest," George crooned.

"Until then my love!" Hermione grinned.

George winked mischievously at her and to Lee's terror and Hermione's amused astonishment, he pulled her into a hilariously passionate kiss. Hermione could tell he was only joking and responded accordingly, trying desperately to stifle her laughter throughout the experience.

After a few more seconds, the two broke apart and Hermione walked happily out the door peeking back to see Lee's petrified face. She burst out laughing right there in the middle of the street and proceeded to make her way back to the Three Broomsticks where Ron and Harry (who conveniently forgot to ask why she hadn't picked up her books) awaited her.

Back at the shop Lee stared at George in disbelief, who sighed happily, staring into space.

"Do you love her?" he managed to stammer

"With every fibre of my being," George responded solemnly

"You're joking right?" Lee asked flatly, "I mean snap out of it man!"

"Would this face lie?" he demanded, while pulling a dangerously serious and emotional expression and fighting an inner battle with himself not to burst out laughing in his dumbfounded friend's face.

He left Lee standing shocked in front of the register and entered the storage closet to share a good laugh with his twin.


	7. Welcome to the Dark Side

_Sorry about the delay, as I said earlier I was on vacation and there was no computer... sorry... and whoever said they were going to beat me to a pulp if I didnt update... I updated so please don't beat me to a pulp! well I guess you couldn't anyway since you don't know who I am or where I live right? okay well enjoy the next chapter!_

**Disclaimer: I dont own Harry Potter or any of JKRowing's storylines or other characters... I just make stuff up for fun!**

_This chapter is dedicated to Rutu for introducing me to fanfics and corrupting my mind... haha (not thanking you for the corrupting part just blaming.. teehee) ...now On With The Chapter!_

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Chapter 7

Welcome to the Dark Side

The next week flew quickly by for Hermione Granger as she waited for the twins to brew her potion. She barely paid attention in class (although it really didn't matter because she was two months ahead of her fellow students) and even Harry and Ron were starting to wonder about her strange behavior. Finally, on Friday evening Hermione received a brief letter from Fred and George.

_Dear Hermione (Dearest?)_

_We are proud to inform you that the potion you requested is finished. Meet us same place, same time tomorrow. _

_ (Love?)_

_ George_

_(and Fred… but he's not your secret lover now is he?)_

Hermione's face lit up with excited happiness as she stifled a laugh and hid the note. It was definitely not something she wanted anyone to see. She stuffed it hastily into the middle of The Life and Memories of Alfredius Morgavadusaly, a biography of the most famous wizard of ancient times as Harry strolled into the common room. No one would ever read it but her, and consequently, no one would ever find the note.

"Hi Hermione!" he greeted, "You're coming to Hogsmead with me and Ron tomorrow right?"

"Ummm well actually," she stuttered, trying to think of a decent excuse, "er… I actually have to go shopping…"

He stared at her dumbly

"You know for like girl stuff," she continued latching onto the idea, "I've outgrown a lot of my clothes and Lavender and Parvati keep bugging me to change my wardrobe a little… not that I'm planning to take most of their advice," she added grimly, "But after a while it gets very tedious to listen to them complain about my lack of fashion,"

At times, her dormmates could get a teensy bit carried away with their looks, Hermione had decided. They layered on the makeup, spent huge sums of money on clothes and instantly threw away anything they deemed unfashionable or ugly. But she thanked them silently for the somewhat plausible excuse they lent her.

"Ohhhhh…" Harry nodded sympathetically, "I know what you mean…"

"You do?" asked Hermione, somewhat confused.

"Yeah, I think it was last year those two kept nagging me to let them cover my 'great ugly scar' with makeup or something. Right… like I would let one of them put makeup on me… I'd probably come out of that looking like the male version of themselves. And why should I hide my scar anyway? It's part of me now…" he concluded softly.

"I think I remember that!" Hermione laughed, I would have hated to be you. It was kind of funny though."

"Okay," Harry changed the topic back again, "I think I understand your problem, and getting a few new clothes should satisfy them for a bit… Just as long as you don't completely change yourself and morph into one of them."

"Yeah like I'd do that," she laughed, "I can see me now, the semi-slutty, makeup-covered bookworm! Don't worry, I'll go with you and Ron to Hogsmead next week. Stop worrying so much!"

"Okay," Harry agreed happily, "g'night."

"Goodnight Harry!" Hermione called after him as he walked sleepily up the stairs to the boy's dormitory. She finished her chapter by the light of a candle and ascended the staircase on the opposite side of the room. She plopped onto her neatly made bed and fell soundly asleep.

On Saturday, Hermione met up with the Weasley pranksters in the closet again. Luckily, Lee was not there to question them, although he had provided one of a kind entertainment.

Hermione's heart fluttered with excitement as she was handed a large glass bottle containing a grayish, inky colored potion.

"Make sure you remember to spike all the juice pitchers in the kitchens." Fred was warning her, "You wouldn't want to spare anyone would you?"

"By the way," interrupted George, "are you planning on taking this potion yourself?"

"Well yes," Hermione admitted , "I think its only fair since its my experiment. It would also look kind of suspicious if the whole school was affected by the potion and I was left untouched. I want to help house elves, not make everyone hate me."

"Yes, I suppose you're right," mused George thoughtfully, "Well then, you should probably spike the drinks Wednesday morning before everyone wakes up. Then the potions effects will most likely wear off by Saturday, Christmas Eve, (depending) just in time for the Winter Ball"

"Oh thank you so much!" Hermione began, but Fred cut her off,

"No problem, Hermione, we just did it to earn some laughs, and maybe sometime in the future we can market this potion as a new product. And of course we did it to help one of our ickle Wonnikins best friends cause mayhem and realize that pranking people is fun!"

"Yeah I still remember when you kept pestering us about our sniving snackboxes," George snickered playfully, "Now where would you be now if we had given up our love of chaos for a boring job at the Ministry like mum and dad wanted? Hmmm?"

Hermione laughed and pulled them both into a tight embrace. The cupboard door opened to reveal a seemingly unfazed Lee.

"Oh great," he muttered sarcastically to himself, "It's a threesome now. I really really really need to go see a psychiatrist." He turned around and stalked out the shop door, the bell affixed to the handle jingling merrily behind him.

Hermione, Fred and George simultaneously burst out laughing once again.

"Well, I'd better get going before we get caught again," Hermione groaned as she remembered, "I also have some shopping I need to do."

"It was hilarious while it lasted," added Fred, "have fun spiking those drinks… We'll look forward to the results."

"And welcome to the dark side, Hermione," concluded George solemnly.

_Okay well I hope you like the chapter! I have one question though, should I make Hermione fall in love with George or not? or someone else? ideas (and reviews) would be nice and appreciated very much! Also if anyone has questions about my story I will try to answer them! Thankees Thankees! _


	8. Spiking In the Rain?

_Hi! wow I updated twice this week! yay! _

_okay well hope you all like the chapter and whatnot!_

Disclaimer: I dont own JKRowling's story... I do own the idea of the somewhat disturbing article of clothing mentioned later though.

_Todays chapter is dedicated to MotherCrumpet for being my first _ever_ reviewer! Yaaaayy! haha i like dedicating things. _

_also I still need a few more opinions on whether I should somehow make this also a Hermione/George fic_

_as said in the previous chapter... ideas (and reviews) would be very much appreciated! thankees to all! _

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**Chapter 8**

**Spiking…In the Rain?**

Hermione fidgeted nervously as she sat in the Gryffindor common room. 'Just another ten minutes,' she thought to herself, 'ten more minutes til' the house elves make breakfast.'

She had employed the aid of Dobby, who had informed her that the breakfast drink pitchers were _always_ set at the house tables at exactly 4:30 am. It was currently 4:21 am.

Hermione had _borrowed_ Harry's invisibility cloak to sneak past the teachers and house elves (well mostly the house elves, what kind of person would wake up that early just for the heck of it?). It currently was a soft, bulky bundle hidden just beneath a nearby pillow.

She checked to make sure her potion was still tucked safely in her large pocket and watched the minutes tick slowly by on the huge golden clock that graced the room. Finally, the sleepy Hermione rose and flicked the cloak over her thin frame. She walked towards the portrait on wobbly legs and cursed silently as she banged into the wall (okay, who wouldn't do something like that at 4:30am? Seriously.)

She recovered quickly and stole quietly down the halls. As Hermione neared the painting of the bowl of fruit, Dobby crept stealthily (well kinda… how stealthy can you really be with huge ears and a gazillion pairs of socks on?) around a corner.

Hermione slipped the cloak of and whispered, "Dobby!"

The aforementioned jumped and spun around in fright.

"It's just me Dobby."

"Oh! Miss Granger," Dobby squealed in relief, "Dobby is very glad to be seeing you miss."

"As am I Dobby," she replied as she slipped a small vial from her pocket and filled it with her potion. She corked it and handed it to the renegade elf. "Why don't you go pay your old masters a visit and spike their morning juice?" she suggested slyly.

"Dobby would be utterly delighted," he squeaked, his excitement at this request even caused him to used proper grammar (except for the whole third person thing).

He accepted the vial of murky gray potion carefully from Hermione's outstretched hand. He then snapped his twiggy fingers and vanished with a 'pop' in a cloud of blue mist.

Hermione slipped the cloak back on a tickled the pear in the painting. It squirmed and the painting swung open the reveal the relatively unseen kitchens of Hogwarts. She snuck past the many busy house elves (happy and brainwashed, Hermione shook her head sadly) and finally spied the small corridor which connected the kitchens to the great hall.

Hermione managed to creep through the narrow passageways, periodically having to leap clear over an unsuspecting house elf's jolly bald head. She finally reached the Great Hall and decided to begin her spiking at the Slytherin table.

She poured a small amount of liquid into each crystal pitcher brimming with juice and watched as the juice faded to gray then instantly sprang back to its original color.

She made her way from the Slytherin table, to the Ravenclaw and Hufflepuff tables and finally the Gryffindor table, spiking all the pitchers on the way. Hermione was just about to leave when she remembered the teacher's table. She quickly tipped the remains of the potion into the last pitcher, and darted back towards her dormitory.

"What the…" Hermione gasped as she passed the teacher's bathroom for she had heard the strangest noise. A sort of odd screeching wail that was definitely not Moaning Myrtle. As she stood pondering the doorknob suddenly turned and a frightened Hermione quickly scampered behind a large pillar before realizing she was still invisible.

A pale, ghostlike figure emerged, but it was like no ghost Hermione had ever seen. "What kind of ghost do I know that wears such clothes?" The confused witch murmured to herself.

Indeed, the ghost was wearing a very unusual garment that happened to be a sunny yellow bathrobe sprinkled with embroideries bearing the resemblance of … yellow rubber duckies!

"I'm Siiiiiinging in the raaaiiin! Juuust Siiiining in the Raaaiiin," the ghost began as it turned to face in Hermione's general direction, "What a Gloooorriiooouuus Daaay..." the ghost was cut off by a sudden soft thump behind an oversized pillar. It poked its greasy black head around the corner but saw nothing.

"Hmph… They just don't make castles like they used to." Muttered the yellow duckie clad Snape.

_Okay hope you liked the chapter! til nextime! (reviews?)  
_

_-oli _


	9. The Invisible Adventures Of George

_Okay this is the last chapter for today!_

_Disclaimer: I dont own Harry Potter! okay?_

_ This chapter id dedicated to uhhh... my computer! because without it this story would just be pages ina notebook and noone could read it! hahaha_

Chapter 9

The Invisible Adventures of George Weasley:

George strolled the corridors of Hogwarts casually at 4:30 in the morning. He was conveniently camouflaged by an invisibility spell he had learned. 'Where was that Hermione? Surely she would be on her way to the Great Hall by now. Oh of course, she would have nicked Harry's cloak for the job.'

Feeling slightly reassured, George ducked under a wall tapestry and followed the secret shortcut he and his twin had discovered during second year. He emerged seconds later in the Great Hall and seated himself (invisibly) at Dumbledore's large podium seat.

He waited for a few long moments before catching sight of a trickle of gray liquid pouring itself seemingly from midair. George smirked in satisfaction, 'So Hermione really did have the guts to do this. I can't say I didn't doubt her at first since she must be breaking at least a dozen school rules by following through.'

George watched the gray liquid pour itself into half a dozen more pitchers, then disappear momentarily to reappear at the Ravenclaw table. The fine gray stream of liquid worked its way down the Ravenclaw table, then moved onto the Hufflepuff table, and finally the Gryffindor Table.

The soft padding of Hermione's footsteps worked its way towards the door of the Hall, then scuffed to a stop. The muffled sound then retraced its steps towards the podium where George was seated.

'Oh no! Did she see me?' George looked down, 'nope still invisible, what's she doing then?' he started to panic until the final droplets of the gray potion splashed down into the pitcher of pumpkin juice that sat innocently in front of him.

"Oh," he sighed heavily in relief.

The invisible Hermione seemed to pause for a moment as if trying to hear him.

'oh '

But apparently she dismissed the idea and the soft thumps of her footsteps retreated out of the Great Hall.

"phew that was close!" George mumbled to himself as he sprang down from his seat and followed the faint sound of Hermione's footsteps.

Suddenly, Hermione's footsteps sidetracked behind a large pillar just as a nearby doorknob turned.

He ducked behind a curtain, relatively close to the pillar as he saw a figure emerge shrouded in a cloud of steam. Yes, of course he knew he was invisible, but if whoever it was decided to run through the halls, they wouldn't smack into an invisible George. From his viewpoint, George was just barely able to make out the person's face, as the steam dissipated.

'HOLY $&!'

'Please tell me that isn't Snape! Whoever that is please please please tell me that isn't Snape in a yellow bathrobe with…. DUCKIES!' His mind screamed in agony.

But it was Snape and George also noted the barely audible thud that echoed slightly from behind the oversized pillar. As soon as Snape had drifted off in the direction of the dungeons, George rushed over to the pillar and pulled the invisibility cloak from Hermione's pale face.

He quickly felt her clammy wrists and was relieved to find a lively pulse.

'The sight probably just shocked her,' George realized, 'That, I think, was disturbing enough to make almost anyone faint of disgust.'

He pulled a bottle of rejuvenation potion from his robe's pocket (he had used it to stay awake) and tipped three drops into Hermione's slightly open mouth.

George then sat back on his heels and studied the young witch's face. 'She should wake up within the hour' he thought in the back of his mind, as his eyes traces and memorized her features. 'She looks so peaceful when she sleeps… Not like she usually is, always moving and eager to do things, standing up for her friends and beliefs… It amazes me…. What am I thinking? She's my brother's best friend…. But the kiss? Oh that was just a joke. Who am I kidding? And why am I talking to myself?' He sighed heavily and dropped the fold of cloak back over her sleeping face.

He then trudged back the way he came, through the Forbidden Forest until he was outside school grounds where he apparated back to his bedroom at the Burrow.

"George! Where were you?" Fred demanded, "I know you know I am a_ very_ light sleeper!"

"I was checking to make sure Hermione spiked the drinks! Calm down!" George whispered curtly, "And you are sooo NOT a light sleeper!"

"Well… maybe sometimes," Fred admitted sheepishly, "did she actually do it?"

"Yeah, why don't we get some sleep now? It's still just about 5:00"

"Okay," agreed Fred, "night."

"morning," corrected George.

"night," Fred insisted, "It's still dark out!"

"morning"

"night"

"Morning."

"Night."

"Morning!"

"Night!"

"MORNING!"

"NIGHT!"

The two bickered until about 5:30 when they gave up and finally fell asleep.

_Bye! Hope you liked!_

_-oli _


	10. House Elf Pandemonium

_And finally! the moment you've all been waiting for! what does the potion do? read on! hope you like it! _

_-oli _

**Disclaimer: no**

Chapter 10:

House Elf Pandemonium

Hermione woke groggily on the cold stone floor – wait – floor? Why was she on the floor? She propped herself into a sitting position and the invisibility cloak slipped slightly off her shoulders. She stared at it and memories of the past few hours flooded her mind.

Finished spiking the drinks… sneaking back to the common room when………..

SNAPE SINGING IN A YELLOW DUCKIE BATHROBE!

Her mind reeled and threatened to knock her out cold again. After she got over her shock and disgust, she checked the time, 5:03 am. Well that was a relief, she still had time to return to her bed and pretend to sleep.

She sprinted back to the portrait and whispered the password. She then crept up the stairs to the girl's dorm and fell into an exhausted slumber.

………….3 ½ H O U R S L A T E R ……….

"Hermione!... Her-mi-oh-neeee!" Lavender yelled, "Get up!... Rise and Shine?... Wakie wakie eggs and bakie!... Get up nooooowww!"

Hermione complied slowly, then remembered what she had done just hours before. A goofy smile sprang to her face and she bounced happily out of bed.

"Why are you so damn cheerful today?" asked a confused Lavender.

"Uhmm…. We're getting our transfiguration results back today?" Hermione supplied quickly.

"Oh right… don't remind me," Lavender groaned.

Hermione threw on some clothes and skipped downstairs to the common room where Harry and Ron awaited her.

"Mornin' Mione!" Harry greeted

"Foooood! I need fooood!" Ron moaned.

"Good morning Harry… Ron" she added as an afterthought.

"Less talking! More moving!" He demanded as he ushered them towards the portrait.

Hermione was just as happy to do so and let herself and Harry be prodded down the halls by the ravenous Weasley.

They took their seats and Hermione eyed the beverage pitchers nervously. She fidgeted and her hands shook as she poured herself a tall glass of pumpkin juice. She would just have to trust the twin's potion making skills.

"Err.. pumpkin juice anyone?" she asked

Ron's hand shot up, but his face stayed buried in his towering mountain of eggs as Hermione filled his cup to the brim. He took a brief reprieve from inhaling food to take a large gulp of his juice.

'One down, a couple hundred more to go,' Hermione thought evilly to herself, 'but what if some people didn't take a drink?

Hermione shouldn't have worried because her problem was soon to be settled.

Dumbledore rose clumsily from his seat at the head table and cleared his throat (very loudly for approximately 17 ½ seconds).

"Damn phlegm!" he managed to croak.

He proceeded to cough and attempt to clear his throat for about 11 more seconds until Madame Pomfrey bustled over with a hideously pink potion for him to swallow.

"Ahh… thank you Poppy, that's much better."

He looked around at his students who were not paying the slightest amount of attention. They looked extremely bored/pissed off by having to wait 27 ½ seconds plus the extra 12 seconds it took him to chug the potion. (Colin however had managed to get several authentic photos of Dumbledore choking on his own nasal drippings. But that's not really pertinent)

"Attention! Attention!" he cried while banging his knife on his gold rimmed plate. "Attention damn it! He repeated while whacking his poor plate with a renewed ferocity. (this succeeded in not only shattering the expensive looking plate, but also in gaining most of the student's attention.

"I should like to propose a toast (his shrewd eyes gleamed as he caught and held Hermione's gaze) to three more days of classes, four more days until our annual winter ball, and five more days until Christmas! (or Hanukkah!)" He tipped the contents of his goblet into his mouth and looked expectantly at the Hogwarts students to do the same. They stared at him wondering fleetingly if he had finally rocked off his rocker. What kind of a toast was that?

"Oh come now!" he chided. "It's just a toast! Have a little holiday spirit or I'll be forced to install the mistletoe again!" (Just last year, the crazed headmaster had jinxed the mistletoe to follow any two people who had the misfortune to walk under it together, and keep them within three feet of each other until they kissed.)

The student body hurriedly raised their goblets in toast and swallowed at the headmaster's threat.

Hermione's hand trembled violently as she brought her cup to her mouth. She flinched as the juice touched her lips then fearfully sipped the sweet liquid. Well at least now, she knew that everyone had consumed some of the Weasley twins' potion. Now she just had to wait until the effects began to set in.

"Feeling okay?" Harry asked kindly.

"Yeah I just,"

'pOp!' a cloud of orange smoke interrupted her mid-sentence, and wafted away to reveal a dumpy looking house elf with large blue tennis ball eyes, and a few wiry red hairs protruding from its nearly bald head.

"Ron?" Harry asked incredulously.

The elf looked down and gasped in horror, "Ro… Ron be a elf!" it whimpered.

"Ha! Lookin' good Weasel!" Malfoy smirked as he strode past. He halted abruptly and collapsed on the floor. This was followed by a loud pop accompanied by a silvery green burst of smoke. A second elf stood before the Gryffindor table. Its icy blue eyes widened in terror as it felt its oversized ears and sparsely rooted, platinum blonde hairs.

"Gahh!" it screeched, "Draco be elf! Draco be elf! Heeeeelp! Draco pureblood no elf! No elf!"

The students' heads swiveled over in his direction as the newly transformed elf began banging its head repeatedly along the ornately carved table leg, as if to rid itself of its elflike qualities.

Ron (the elf) stared dumbfounded into space repeating, "Ron not be elf… Ron not elf… Ron dreaming… no elf… no elf in shower… never elf in shower."

Pandemonium erupted as a series of 'pOp' s were heard followed by a wide array of colored smoke. As the colors mixed an intertwined, the great hall was left in a grayish , muddy fog and mutterings, shouts, and frenzied squeaks were heard throughout.

"Pansy/Cho/Seamus/Severus/Ginny/Dean/Hannah/Ernie/(insert name here) not be elf! Noooo! Not elf!"

All throughout the rising chaos, a small mousy haired elf with chocolate brown eyes squealed happily, "Hermy be elf! Hermy plan working!" she paused and frowned slightly, "Hermy not be remembering proper grammar.

To be continued…

_Well hope you liked it! review?_


	11. Old Masters New Masters

_Yay I kept my promise! here's another chapter for everyone!_

_-oli_

**Disclaimer: If I said I owned this story, would you care?**

Chapter 11

Old Masters New Masters

As chaos reigned down below, an enormous peacock cut through the air from the large open window of the Hall. Clutches in its delicate beak was a blood red envelope.

The exotic bird folded its azure wings primly and alighted in front of the stooped old elf that was Dumbledore. It blinked innocently and dropped the letter from its jewel studded mouth. The flashy animal then took flight and flapped out the window, ignoring the bewildered stares it attracted.

The Great Hall became deathly silent as the Howler leapt into the air and ripped itself open.

"Dear students of Hogwarts!" George's voice bellowed.

"Or I guess we should say elves!" added Fred's voice.

"By being in Hogwarts on the absolutely _lovely_ morning, (and may I say that if it keeps snowing like this we'll have a white Christmas), you have each unknowingly, chosen to participate in one of the Greatest Pranks in all of Hogwarts' history, courtesy of us, George and Fred Weasley!" George's voice cheered.

"You have been transformed into elves," the voice of Fred continued, "although that's probably already pretty obvious. The only way to return to your former selves, I'm afraid, is to work like the house elves you are!"

"Maybe you'll even be able to go the winter ball as humans!" George's echoing voice added.

"Well have fun kids!" Fred's voice laughed, "I know we will!"

"Good luck!" boomed George's voice.

A small flame burned along the crimson envelope's edge and soon grew to consume the whole letter. The charred ashes floated peacefully to the intricate stone floor.

'Bloody brilliant,' thought Hermione, impressed.

As the last of the blackened paper fell from the air, the Hall erupted into anxious whispers and fitful bursts of squeaking.

0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o

"Ahhh! Lav Lav not go to ball as elf! Must not!" a distressed Lavender (or dare we call her Lav Lav?) wailed pitifully.

"Bad! Bad! Bad!" agreed an equally distraught Parvati, who was unavailingly attempting to rip her overlarge ears off her head.

0o0o0o0o0o000o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o

"Draco not work!" Draco muttered obstinately to himself, "When father hear, he avada stupid Weezies and fix poor Draco!"

0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o

Meanwhile, at the head table, Dumbledore and the teachers (or elves) were conversing in hushed squeals. They concluded their discussion quickly and returned to their respective seats.

"Order! Order!" squeaked Dumbledore. The wizened old elf tugged at his wormy white beard and banged his spoon like a gavel on his table.

He did not gain order, but instead, angry stomping footsteps were hears down the corridor, followed by the appearance of two raging house elves. The first sported sparsely scattered platinum blonde hair and a large, shimmery (although wrinkled) black bow. It stepped forward indignantly to address Dumbledore.

"What is being the meaning of this?" it squealed shrilly, "Why you turn Narcissi (he pointed to the elf behind him), Draco (the finger turned to his son), and Lucy (the finger now moved to his chest) to elves! You change back now or pay big!" It threatened.

"If you is wanting to be human Lucy," Dumbledore replied, "you is needing to be calming down!"

The bow bedecked creature hurled itself at Dumbledore in response, with every intention to bruise/kick/bite/punch/hit/smash/hurt him as much as possible.

CrAcK a cloud of dark blue appeared in front of Dumbledore and Dobby leapt from it onto Lucius Malfoy, successfully managing to pin the crazed elf down.

"You no hurt new master!" Dobby scolded fearlessly.

He escorted Lucius to the back of the Hall where his hands were bound and he was sat on by half a dozen elves to keep him under control.

Dobby then turned his stern gaze to Narcissi Malfoy until she meekly replied, "Narcissi no make trouble," and took a seat a good distance away from Dobby.

"Ahem!" Dumbledore squealed, "we is wanting to tell yous that all student elfs is getting a 'elf buddy' to be mentor. You must obey elf buddy always. Remember if working hard, spell wear off before ball! Dobby be now assigning elf buddies!"

He relinquished his spot on the table to the multi-socked elf who began giving orders.

"student elfs this side!" he pointed a stubby finger to his right, "house elfs this side," he indicated to his left.

The students shuffled awkwardly into place, still a bit dazed from their experience, as the elves poured in from all directions to stand by Dobby. They looked in wonder-filled amazement at the students they had previously bowed down to.

Dobby scanned the faces that made up the crowd and his somewhat devious mind began to formulate a plan. He scratched his bald head thoughtfully and examined his old masters with a curious expression on his face. Curious, very curious.

To be continued…

_Review! I'll update again when I get a bunch of reviews! So review! or else! muahahahaha! ifeel soooo evil!  
_

_-oli _


	12. Elf Buddies!

_ok kinda short chapter... but completely necessary! promise_

**Disclaimer: Blumby is mine! all mine! and the Gri y elves are also mine! muahahaha**

** but sadly, none of the rest is... :( **

Chapter 12

Elf Buddies

"Dobby call two names!" Dobby explained, "One of student, one of elf. When Dobby call name, come forward and stand with elf buddy!" He took a deep breath, "Hermy is being with Winky!" Both stepped forward and smiled at each other (Winky was now very happy and received a small salary like Dobby). They situated themselves at the opposite wall to watch the rest of the pairings.

"Ron Weezy go to Blumby elf!" A green faced Ron wobbled forward to stand with the jolly obese house elf, who held the position of head cook. They joined Hermione and Winky and the assignments continued.

"Harry Potter to come with Dobby!" the enthusiastic elf pointed proudly to himself. An emerald eyed elf with a scar on its head grinned gratefully at Dobby.

"Next be…" Dobby's eyes lit up with glee, "Ex-master Draco and Gribby!" A surly looking, coal eyed elf slumped forward and looked around for his charge.

"Draco refuse to work under such beast!" Draco sniffed obstinately.

Dobby had no time to reply as Gribby had grabbed Draco's leg and was now dragging him roughly toward the other paired elves. Upon reaching the small group, Gribby pulled Draco to swing upside down in the air while banging him into a handy column for good measure.

"You listen to Gribby," he growled warningly, before dropping the frightened Malfoy on his head.

Dobby smiled in satisfaction and continued with his pairings. He recited the rest of his list in the most random order possible. At last, only the teachers, Narcissa, and Lucius were left partner less.

"Okay!" squeaked Dobby, "Ex-master and ex-mistress Malfoy reporting to Grimmy for work. Hehe Dobby clever… Grimmy and Gribby is family and Malfoys is family. Also, teachers seeing Dobby for work! No More!"

A wide grin spread across the newly empowered elf's face.

_Review! it will make me update faster! especially if i get like 10 that say in huge letters UPDATE PLEASE! yes politeness counts too! lol. I know what I'm going to put... I just have to type it_

_and I know that this chapter was v e r y short but i promise the next one is l o n g e r... _

_-Oli! _


	13. What is this Oven You Speak of?

_yay you all did soooo good with the reviews i just had to update! see? reviewing does make a difference!_**  
**

**Disclaimer: Yeah sure! Of course I'm JK Rowling! Thats exactly why I'm posting stories on fanfiction instead of selling them for billions of dollars every day! What can I say? I'm a changed person!**

_Note to the public... If you actually belive the above, you're either gullibly stupid, or stupidly gullible. pick one. If you didn't believe it... GOOD JOB! you can now officially graduate grade school! woot woot for you! _

_I will now stop bugging you so you can read the story... 5 pages! my longest yet! GO ME! _

Chapter 13

What is this oven you speak of?

"Well? What is all waiting for?" demanded Dobby, "Holidays in just four days! We's is needing to be getting ready! Hurry Hurry!"

The overexcited elf threw his hands up in the air and shooed everyone except the teachers and Harry out of the Hall.

0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o

Hermione (aka Hermy) followed an elated Winky out of the Great Hall.

"Where is we going Winky?" she asked

"Oh! Winky have special job! Very special!" she squealed, "Because Winky and Dobby is free elfs, Dumbledore sir is letting us pick whatsoever job we is wanting! Winky and Hermy is getting to decorate the big tree!" she beamed.

Hermione smiled at the elf's newfound happiness. If only all the elves would follow the example Winky and Dobby set. She and Winky had, by this time, reached the entrance to the school. They passed through the huge wooden doors and onto a well worn path. The two elves trudged atop the thickening snow and ran the last couple of yards to Hagrid's hut.

"Hagrid sir!" Winky yelped while rapping harshly on the gnarled oak door. "We is needing the tree now!"

The door opened to reveal the somewhat shorter, although still heavy enough to break a scale, elf with a dark beard so thick its face was almost completely shrouded.

"Ello Winky!" greeted Hagrid, although this was somewhat muffled by the thick fluffy facial hair, "And Ermione? We is wantin' to pick up that tree now eh?" he assumed.

Without waiting for an answer, he ushered them out and led them to the side of his house where a felled evergreen lay.

Hermione and Winky stood by while the elf version of Hagrid deftly fastened ropes around the thick trunk of the tree. He stood back for a moment, then heaved mightily at the ropes. Even though he was not even half his original height, he still possessed inhumane (or unelflike? idk) strength

The tree gave a little, and Hagrid proceeded to drag it across Hogwarts' sloping lawns, Hermione and Winky trailing slightly behind to gather the fallen branches. The group ascended up the massive stone steps and warmth penetrated their frigid bodies as they entered the castle.

They somehow managed to get the cumbersome tree into a standing position and Hagris turned to leave.

"Well, I best be getting' off nows, Fang is gotting big elfy ears, as the like. Guess the spell not be workin' good on animals such as he.

"We's be seeing you soon Hagris," Hermione called after him, before turning back to the work at hand.

She noted with a hint of confusion that while the tree was being put up, someone had dropped off a pile of… well… junk. Broken hairclips, discarded chocolate frog wrappers, a stack of old papers and even a ratty, mangles quaffle, among other things, lay heaped into a crude pile on the floor. Winky however, what utterly delighted at this odd assortment of trash.

"We is going to make the most nicest tree ever!" she beamed as she picked through the mess.

She grabbed a yellowed square of parchment and examined the huge scarlet T scrawled across it. Winky's spindly fingers promptly closed in around the unsatisfactory exam, crushing it into a ball.

Hermione stared, racking her mind for the reasons behind Winky's actions. But Winky, oblivious to Hermione's confusion, kept packing the paper ball tighter and tighter, her goggling eyes, for once, closed shut in concentration. After what seemed like an eternity, the hands parted slightly and Winky revealed to Hermione, a perfect golden orb with tiny crimson shapes scattered artfully about.

"But Winky…" Hermione gaped, "Never has Hermy ever read this in a book. Never"

"Many wizards and witches are not liking that house elfs knows hard magic," Winky explained, "So house elfs is not telling many people. But Dumbledore sir, he is very much liking this, so we's is being allowed to have magic here."

After a short pause she risked shyly, "Would Hermy Miss be liking to learn wandless magic?"

"I'd love to," breathed Hermione.

Winky hung the golden ornament carefully on the huge tree while Hermione began to sort through the rubbish.

0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o00o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o

"H e e e y! What is being this uh-ven you is speaking of?" Ron interrupted Blumby, head chef of Hogwarts, for the fourth time.

"Ronald," Blumby sighed, "oven is being what we is cooking in."

"Ooooohhh… well what is this being?"

"That is being a blender," the slightly peeved elf replied.

"BUTTONS!" Ron cried happily while quickly pushing them all with both hands.

"NO! Ronald MUSN'T!" Blumby gasped in mortification.

Too late…

Betty Mocker's Magic Mixer had already roared to life and instantly pureed the strawberries and bananas (still with the peel) that were inside it. Blumby flinched as a wave of strawberry-banana smoothie smacked Ron full in the face (he had stupidly not put the lid on) then spattered messily all over the once-sparkling kitchen. This was going to be a l o n g day, Blumby fumed angrily. No more Mr.NiceElf.

Once he had regained his composure, Blumby wiped a glob of smoothie pointedly off his face and turned to Ron. The redheaded elf was covered completely in the gooey pink substance. His tongue poked out to lick experimentally at a particularly large splotch on the tip of his nose.

"mmm… not bad," he mused.

He then noticed Blumby's incessant glare and grinned sheepishly. "Woopsies?"

Blumby's glare intensified.

"Uhh… Guessing not then? heh heh…"

"Ronald is destroying Blumby's kitchen!" the enraged elf ranted, "Ronald is making fools of he and poor Blumby!" the fat elf waddled over to the sink and grabbed the sprayer.

"Eh. Be watching where you is pointing that!" Ron edged away from the sprayer's line of fire.

"Ronald is needing to get clean," Blumby explained suddenly calm, "then is needing punishment for actions." With the last word accompanied a flood of icy water which rained down on Ron just hard enough to send him sliding into the red brick wall of the kitchen.

A drenched Ron slowly rose from a pond-sized puddle and stared ferociously at his 'elf buddy'.

Blumby looked over his dripping form with a hint of satisfaction His eyes flickered shut for a few moments and he clapped his twisted hands together twice. Almost instantaneously the large pink splatters on the walls vanished and the puddles seemed to mop themselves up. Only Ron was left incredibly damp and sticky.

"A… but… wha?... how" Ron stammered.

Blumby gave him an innocently cheerful smile and thumped him heartily on the back, "There, there… all is forgiven. Ronald must be following Blumby now. There is dishes whos needs cleaning!"

A still sopping Ron was led to the other end of the huge kitchen where a towering stack of dirty breakfast dishes awaited him.

"We is having to wash all these?" he whined

"No." Blumby stated simply as Ron let out a huge sigh of relief, "You is having to wash all these." He corrected merrily.

"WHAT?" Ron roared (haha… house elf… roaring… I crack myself up… just ignore me…hahahahaha)

"Punishment Ronald," Blumby reminded him tersely, "If Ronald is making no more trouble today, maybe he is let to learn to cook tomorrow."

Blumby walked away to help the other elves prepare the next meal, leaving Ron to mutter incoherent phrases at his retreating form that sounded oddly like… bloody.. obese….dishes….sprayer…evil…bugger….wet…sticky...dishes.

He reluctantly grabbed a soapy blue sponge and squeezed it mercilessly until all the bubbles oozed out. Ron could only wish it was Blumby's head as he dragged it nastily across a syrup encrusted platter.

0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o

Hermione's brow furrowed and her breath rose and fell rhythmically as she twirled her index finger quickly around and around a piled up, ratty blue scarf. The stringy material melted into itself and the individual fibers wove themselves together to form a seamless, translucent and beautiful cloth sphere. Hermione opened her warm brown eyes and lovingly affixed her final ornament to the now color-bedecked tree.

"It is beautiful Winky," she whispered.

"But not finished yet," Winky informed her. She scrambled over to the now empty head table and retrieved a large glass jar. It was buzzing with every color of the rainbow, the odd lights leaving luminescent trails of sparkling dust behind themselves. Upon closer examination, Hermione realized what they were.

"Fairies…" she gazed at them wondrously.

Winky handed the jar to Hermione who twisted the lid and allowed the lustrous beings to burst out in a heavenly cloud of un-retained exhilaration.

The fairies' undiluted exuberance, sense of hilarity and boldness gently reminded Hermione of something… or someone perhaps. A lively whirlwind of red and orange fairies spun around her petite elflike form. The sparkling crimson trails they created delighted Hermione to no end and she laughed happily as she was completely engulfed in a warm, glowing embrace of tiny dancing flames.

_Hope you like my sad attempt at symbolism/foreshadowing there. If you don't review I will be very sad as that was a reeeally long chapter and took me forever to write. so please review? p l e a s e ? It'll make me update faster (again)!_

_-oli _


	14. Seamus Elvish Lover Boy?

_Hello All!_

_You are all soooo lucky that I stopped studying for my midterms to type up this chapter!  
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_I LOVE MIDTERMS! (heheh thought you should all know that lol)_

_2 periods a day go reeeeeaally fast and we get half day's for a week... what's not to like?(oh yeah and since I have study hall Friday i dont have to go!) yay!_

_I'll stop wasting ur time now! on with the story!_

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Chapter 14

Seamus…Elvish Lover boy?

While Hermione and Winky were decorating the tree, and Ron was washing dishes under Blumby's watchful eye, Grimmy and Gribby were having a little fun of their own. The brothers were in charge of maintaining Hogwarts' plumbing system and today seemed like the perfect day to go unclog those old toilets… Not alone of course, they also had the Malfoy family in tow.

"I cannot be going in there!" screeched an enraged Lucius Malfoy.

"Why is not?" demanded Grimmy.

"It's dirty in there, and it is being smelly and wet," he sniffed dramatically.

Grimmy gave him a death glare, but Lucius seemed oblivious to is.

"It is also being the ladies room," he added haughtily.

"Nevertheless Mister Malfoy_ will_ be going," Gribby growled, "as will Missus Malfoy and Mister Malfoy junior."

The two janitorial elves herded Draco and Narcissa into the echoing bathroom and booted Lucius in. Grimmy hung a sign on the outside of the door that "closed for service," then shut the door behind them.

"Today," Gribby began, "yous is be unclogging—"

He was interrupted by a loud wail followed by the appearance of a translucent, grayish, bespectacled young girl floating through a cubicle.

"Wahhhh! Who are you! Come to laugh and gloat over poor moaning myrtle perhaps? Because she's DEAD? Just this morning, I was sitting quietly in my u-bend when $#+ dropped right through me from above. I looked up to see who would_ dare_ to use _my _toilet. I must say I gave them quite a scare, but what's worse, it was a _man_!" Myrtle wailed, "Bloody Argus Filch! Never watching where he drops his dirt! He will regret the day he used _my_ toilet! If he ever enters this bathroom again, I'll ensure he never gets out… alive," she swooped closer, "Ahh, but you're just the house elves I suppose—wait! Don't I know you three?" she pointed to the Malfoys and her beady eyes narrowed, "I Do! YOU!" she pointed to Narcissa and Lucius, "You two used to sneak in here every afternoon after classed, disturbing my peace… despicable!"

Narcissa looked mortified at this accusation.

"Yes I knew," smiling grimly at her reaction, "Because of you, I was forced to hide in the sink plumbing with the spiders! Steal my cubicle will you! You disgust me! And you!" She turned now to Draco, "You and the Slytherin scum you call friends threw urinal cakes at me when I was merely passing by! I loath you all! Go away and leave me in my misery!" she wailed and dove headlong into her toilet.

Water came gushing from the cracked porcelain bowl and flooded the bathroom.

"Eeeke!" screeched Narcissa, "I is getting my new dress all wet!"

Gribby handed her an old stained rag, "Get working," he advised.

Narcissa jumped away from the rag as if it were a bomb.

"I is not stooping to the level of toilet cleaning!" she spat daintily.

Gribby fished a pair of dirty, used, rubber gloves from the flooded floor and dangled them for her to take.

"Yes you is," he answered, "or you will remain elf forever."

"No," she swept away and sat stubbornly on a upturned bucket.

Gribby flung the sopping gloves at Narcissa and they smacked her wetly in the face. She stood up, shaking in pure rage, but Gribby took no notice. Instead he turned to Lucius and Draco.

"Is you twos willing to be working?" Grimmy inquired wearily.

"Indeed not!" replied Lucius.

"If it is to your likening then Mister Malfoy," Gribby answered.

With a nod to his brother, Gribby advanced upon Lucius and grabbed an arm. Grimmy appeared at his other side and pinned down that arm. Lucius was marched into a cubicle with peeling green paint and he faintly recalled seeing the words 'Goyle and Parkinson 4ever' etched in, before his head was plunged into the reeking bowl. He fought wildly, but was un-mercilessly pinned down against the cold seat, his head still submerged under water, while the bowl was flushed repeatedly.

"Great," he thought to himself as he swallowed a mouthful of putrid water, "I'm going to drown in a toilet… Oh crap! My hair will be simply repulsive at the funeral!"

Gribby and Grimmy finally allowed him to resurface and he filled his empty lungs with the rank, grimy air that inhabited the bathroom. His once sleek hair was now plastered to his skin and his large black bow drooped slimily.

As he had no intention of getting shoved into the toilet again, he moodily let the plunger be pushed into his perfectly manicured hand without further argument.

After seeing what happened to Lucius, Draco and Narcissa meekly submitted to menial toilet cleaning. For the next many hours, they endured the squalid bathroom and Myrtle's occasional wails and cascades of ice cold water. Grimmy and Gribby were also hard at work trying to fix the pipes that allowed Myrtle to flood the plumbing so often. Unfortunately, their attempts had proven futile so far.

Draco scrubbed furiously at the already sparkling toilet. Once this was all over he would personally make sure those Weasels got what they deserved… A good kick in the $$. Suddenly, the door to his cubicle swung open.

"Missed a spot!" an annoyingly familiar voice gloated.

Draco whipped around and was instantly blinded by a blatant white flash of light.

"Ahh… there's one for the scrapbook!" laughed Fred evilly. George's head popped into the doorway to join Fred's.

"Yeah Malfoy, Absolutely_ Love_ the new look… Seriously.. huge ears, yellow stained gloves, hairnet (he smirked… well he can't get his pretty hair messy now can he?)… Sooo you!"

Draco snarled in rage and rained a ceaseless torrent of blows at the two insufferable redheads.

"Oooohh," teased George, "little bugger's angry now… We'd best get going now Fred, he's a feisty little fellow."

After a few more purple spots inducing photographs of the Malfoys, the twins exited Moaning Myrtle's bathroom.

0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o

"Haha! Taking pictures of everyone as elves was a great idea!" bounced Fred who was about as happy as Cupid on Valentine's Day, "Let's see…we've gotten Neville, Colin, Blaise, Padma, Ginny, McGonagall and the Malfoys!"

"Brilliant!" agreed George halfheartedly.

"Something wrong mate?" asked Fred noticing his twin's tone.

"No. Course not." Replied George, quickly changing the topic, "Did you see Malfoy though? Priceless!"

"Aww, come on George…" begged Fred as they passed the prefect's bathrooms, "I'm your twin, I _know_ things! What's up?

"Nothing"

"Yeah right! What's wrong?"

"Nothing"

"Liar"

"Nothing for crying out loud! Bloody nothing!"

"Well you sure got worked up about _nothing_." Fred said smugly.

"I'm not worked up!"

"Yes you are"

"Are not"

"Are too"

"Are not!"

"Are too!"

"ARE NOT!"

"tell me what's wrong."

"NOTHING!"

"George! Tell me!"

"There is nothing wrong damnit!"

"Yes there is! Spill!"

"never!"

"HAAAAAAAAAA!"

"what?"

"you just admitted something is wrong."

"#$!"

"now you have to tell!"

"no"

"yes"

"no"

"yes"

"NO"

"fine, but I'll find out eventually,"

snorts "Good luck with that"

0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o

They turned a corner and neared the entrance to the Great Hall. They then hid behind a pillar and peeked in. Fred held the camera at the ready and scanned the room for interesting and highly embarrassing photo opportunities.

But George only had eyes for one person (ok maybe elf—three guesses who). He watched, enraptured as the slim, brown-haired elf with large chocolate eyes gently took a large light-filled container from another elf. She removed the lid and the light burst forth, scattering throughout the hall and swirling madly around the elf. A tiny blue spark of light neared him, and George realized with awe that they were miniscule fairies. He returned his gaze to the elf, who was now bathed in the fiery glow of circling fairies. She twirled around and George took a sharp intake of breath as the sparkling light hit her features at just the right angle. From her gentle brown eyes, bubbled hope, innocence and sheer joy intermingled and blended together so well it was impossible to tell them apart.

"Even as an elf she's beautiful," he murmured softly.

Apparently not softly enough.

"What was that George?" Fred grinned slyly.

"Oh nothing," he fumbled, "erm… just said the tree looks.. ah… beautiful… yeah."

"Yup. The sad part is I would have believed you too George. Except for the fact that you also so casually mentioned the phrase 'even as an elf'. And frankly you can't turn a tree into an elf my brother."

"Er… Right… You're hearing things Fred. I definitely did not say elf, and I'm positive I said tree, not she."

"HAAAAA!"

"what?"

"You just admitted you said the words 'elf' and 'she'!"

"#$!"

"Sooo… let's see…" Fred tapped his chin mockingly, "Something is wrong… and it's about… a she-elf!"

George stared at him stonily.

"Wait! You're in love with an elf?" Fred cried in mock horror.

Unfortunately, George failed to detect the hint of mockery and whispered hotly, "In case you haven't noticed, retard, we've turned the whole bloody school into elves!"

"Ouch!" winced Fred, "Don't get your knockers into a knot!" he paused, "And from your blind fury, I have come to the conclusion that my former conclusion was indeed correct… You are in love… with a female (thank Godric) student (or teacher perhaps? No? Okay) who we have transformed into an elf and you are under the assumption that never in a zillion years could she ever have the same feelings towards you."

George sighed heavily; the truth was out, "How did you know?"

"Because, dear brother, I am your _twin_… I _know _things… Now who is the lucky young lady?"

"Hgushmnyugfckyrsf…"

"Actually I'd rather not," Fred replied cheerfully, "Guess I'll go find out for myself then," he peered into the great hall and caught sight of two figures. He smirked evilly.

"George.." Fred gasped in a dismayed voice, "You've fallen for Hermione?"

"And so what if I have?" George challenged.

"I…well…I love her too..." Fred admitted in the smallest voice he could manage.

"WHAT!" George roared.

"Heh…erm…yeah…guess it's a twin thing eh?" Fred cowered at George's advancing form.

"I SAW HER FIRST!" George bellowed childishly.

"Er… can't we be… brotherly and erm… share or something?" Fred stammered.

"HAVE YOU GONE BLOODY MAD! ARE YOU EVEN THE LEAST BIT SERIOUS?"

Fred stood up from his crouching position and grinned, "Nope! Gotcha! You really _do_ love her!" With that he ducked under his twin's outstretched fist and swaggered over to the large fire place.

"Fred?" asked George in a defeated voice.

"Yup?"

"Have I told you lately how much I hate you?"

"If I remember correctly, then yes, last night when I flicked a glob of mashed potato at your eye… as moody said… CONSTANT VIGILANCE! Tata now! THE BURROW!" A swirling green flame rose up to engulf him.

George angrily grabbed a heavy metal object from his pocket and chucked it forcefully into the spot where his brother's head had just been. It disappeared along with Fred into the burning emerald vortex.

0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o

Fred stepped briskly out into the Weasley kitchen and brushed the dust from his robes. A second later, he heard a large object clatter harshly onto the metal grate behind him. He turned and chuckled to himself, "Hey look! I found a galleon!"

0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o

George gazed once again at the object of his affections as she helped her 'elf buddy' put up tinsel around the hall. Suddenly she spun around and their eyes locked for a long moment. George broke the connection hastily and scurried frantically behind a pillar, his breath trapped within his uncooperative lungs.

"Nonvedetis," he gasped and felt the familiar tingle of iciness trickle down his spine as his body disappeared from view. He padded silently out the thick wooden entry doors of Hogwarts and towards the Forbidden Forest.

Yes, a nice relaxing stroll through the forest, chock-full of dangerous and lethal creatures who would just love to eat him up, ought to soothe his frazzled nerves. Lucky for him, he was invisible.

0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o

Hermione peeked curiously out of the Great Hall. She could have sworn she'd seen George. His face had appeared from behind this pillar, but he was simply not there. She sighed; it had probably just been a trick of the light… or a daydream perhaps. There was just something about him that made him… unique. It was the only way she'd ever been able to tell the twins apart.

Her thoughts were interrupted by the arrival of Harry and Dobby.

"Hello Hermy and Winky!" Dobby chirruped, bowing to Hermione and bending down to brush a kiss across Winky's hand, as she blushed profusely.

"Hi Dobby! Hi Harry!" Hermione replied, "What is yous doing today? We was decorating the tree."

"Dobby and Harry is getting to boss around all the teachers!" Harry spoke with relish, "Harry had even made Sevvy Snapey to wash the chamber pots… And Dobby showed Harry wand-less DADA spells even!" Harry relayed proudly.

"Yes isn't it being wonderful?" agreed Hermione, "Winky is teaching Hermy to do wand-less transfigurations too!"

The four elves began to exit the Great hall but were halted by the sudden presence of a damp, moody Ron.

"Bloody Blumby," he muttered darkly as way of explanation.

"Ronald should not be pushing buttons so much," Dobby chided with a grin, "Blumby is telling me everything isn't he Harry Potter?"

Harry laughed, "C'mon, time for us to be getting going. Bye Dobby and Winky!"

The group parted, Dobby and Winky one way, the Golden Trio, another. As Dobby and Winky padded away, their hands accidentally touched, and Dobby interlaced his fingers in hers.

"Awww… they is sooo cute," Hermione squealed.

"Please," Ron scoffed, "Someone to gag Ron."

"Harry agrees with Hermy; It is good they is happy."

The three ascended up the stairs. When they reached the top, an odd squeaking noise could be heard.

"Shhh.." Hermione shushed them.

She followed the noise to a cleaning supplies closet and put her hand on the knob. With Harry and Ron behind her, she whipped open the door.

"Seamus!" Ron asked incredulously, "And who is you?" he indicated towards the pretty young elf in Seamus' arms.

"Cerilly," she whispered fearfully, "please do not be saying anything of this," she implored, "Goodbye Seamus"

She disentangled herself from Seamus and scurried quickly away.

"Thanks a lot!" squeaked Seamus sarcastically at Ron before dashing after Cerilly.

Hermione, Harry and Ron stared at one another in disbelief. (use your imagination and tell me what perverted ideas you all have come up with…lol)

"Well that was," Harry began.

"Awkward," answered Hermione.

"Gross," Harry continued.

"Hilarious!" finished Ron laughing his head off.

Harry and Ron joined in and they climbed the stairs to their respective dorms, still chuckling at the odd incident. Seamus and a house elf… Who Knew?

_wow! 8 pages... well I guess George & Fred's argument took up about one page... Oh well!_

_REVIEW! or else! 8 pages surely deserves a nice review? p l e a s e ? _


	15. The Lesser Hall

_Okay... short chapter... sorry! at least I updated!_

_**Disclaimer: nope... not mine... yet-muahahaha...jkjk**_

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Chapter 15

The Lesser Hall

She gazed deeply into his light blue eyes, her small hands cupped in his larger ones.

"I love you," he said softly.

"I love you more," she replied playfully.

"Wanna bet?" he gently captured her lips in his and tingles shot down her spine. She leaned into him and…

"—Hermione!" a voice called from faraway, "Hermione!"

She started to pull away, but his arms circled around her waist and held her to him all the tighter.

"Leave them," he whispered in her ear, "just for a few more minutes."

"Hermione!" the voice demanded.

"Let them wait…" he insisted quietly.

"Okay…" she smiled into his kisses, "…George…"

"HERMIONE!"

"Wha?" her eyes fluttered open, "How is you getting here Harry?"

"Broom," he replied, "Ron is suffering of food deprivement and if you is not waking up now, he is leaving."

"You is ruining Hermy's dream," she accused sourly.

"huh? What was it being about?"

"Hermy is not remembering now," Hermione stated truthfully. The only parts she managed to recall was that she hadn't been a house elf… and it had been blissfully wonderful.

She crossly left her soft warm be and tossed her robes carelessly on. She sighed in annoyance as they pooled up around her feet. With her eyes closed, she spread her arms out and the black cloth that made up the sleeves draped down to brush up against the floor. An instant later, the sleeves had shrunken to a comfortable length and the hemmed bottom reached only to her ankles.

Hermione smiled slightly, she really was getting the hang of the whole wandless magic thing. Hopefully she would still be able to use it when she returned to her former self. She followed Harry downstairs (he on his firebolt, she on the stairs), to a pacing Ron.

"Where is you being?" he demanded, "Ron is hungry! Need food Now!"

They made their way to the Great Hall and were amazed to see that there were simply no tables.

"What! Bu… but… but…" Ron gaped in disbelief, "But where is being the food?"

Blumby walked cheerfully up, "Doesn't being silly Ronald!" House elves never be eating in the Great Hall!"

He led the confused students into a narrow passageway and sown a shallow flight of worn stone steps. Ron gasped in shock as they entered a miniature version of the Great Hall. Instead of four long house tables, this hall had many round wooden tables with stools. The simple tables were laid with elf sized plates, goblets and cutlery.

Ron, Harry and Hermione glanced upwards and were met with the familiar, glasslike ceiling, currently sporting a spectacular sunrise with only a few lone clouds in the sky.

"Woah…" Ron gasped again, "There is being a huge elf city under Hogwarts and no one is knowing til now."

True enough, three passageways leading away from the mirror image of the Great Hall led to the individual living quarters of the elves.

Blumby's eyes twinkled, "Welcome to the Lesser Hall! Now let us not be standing here gawking all of today! Time for food and eating yes?"

Ron nodded ravenously and he, Hermione, Harry and Blumby joined Dobby and Winky who were already seated.

"I is being confused," Hermione frowned, "Why is we eating in the Great Hall yesterday instead of here?"

"Oh! We was just needing to add tables and such!" Winky replied

Meanwhile, Ron was in panic-mode.

"Where is eggs and sausage?" he cried feverishly, "there always is eggs and sausage! Ron see no egg or sausage!"

"Ronald!" Blumby smacked him to get him to shut up.

"Owww!" he mumbled

"House elves is being vegetarian… no sausage! There is eggs though," Blumby pushed a heaping bowl of scrambled eggs with basil his way.

Ron eyed them with distaste, "Eggs is no good without sausage," he decided, and helped himself to a jelly doughnut.

Harry gazed about the lesser hall, recognizing certain paintings from the Great Hall above, only slightly smaller. He choked on his toast.

"Harry! Is you okay?" Hermione asked.

"there… Cer… cough… illy… is… eww…Seam…us…ack…" he sputtered.

"huh?"

Harry pointed to a table in the corner of the room, and sure enough there were Seamus and Cerilly (the elf for those who don't remember) gazing deeply into one another's eyes. (A/N: but hey! They could just be having a staring contest or something… not likely but still a possibility! Heheh)

"Oh my…" Hermione breathed, "is that even being normal?"

"Hmmm… let's think…" Ron's head popped up from his plate, "NO!"

Dobby shook his head sadly, "Cerilly was always being a strange one."

"Could be saying the same as for Seamus," Ron agreed.

The six elves finished their breakfast and took their plates to the kitchen where Draco was on dish-duty (well, not really, unless you count sitting stubbornly with your back to the sink as dish-duty).

Blumby glared at the stubborn young Malfoy and smacked him upside the head. Draco lunged back but Blumby dodged the blow neatly and exited the kitchen, followed by Dobby, Winky, Ron, Hermione and Harry.

The group parted, Ron and Blumby turned left and tromped up a winding staircase towards the storerooms, Winky and Hermione returned to the Great Hall to finish decorating, and Harry and Dobby descended a staircase to the basements of Hogwarts in search of the laundry room where they would wash socks… As Dobby argued, "Socks is the bestest clothes ever, but they is not being pleasant when is smelly. And besides, all other elfses is a'feared of getting freed by touching socks."

_Review? please? i'll update a whole lot faster!_

_-oli _


	16. Stolen Glances

_ok short little chapter again... sorry for that... but I couldn't figure out how to make it much longer without ruining the next few chapters...i was going to update this yesterday but it wouldn't let me submit it... idk why_

Chapter 16

Stolen Glances

"You _will_ tell her!" Fred said forcefully.

"Nope- nothing doing…" George muttered.

"Yes you will!" Fred insisted.

"No," George answered simply.

"She deserves to know!"

"Why? So she can hate me for it?" George spat.

"For the last time, she _does not_ hate you!"

"Not yet," he said darkly.

"Why must you insist on the stupidest reasons?" moaned Fred, "It's not like you've never said, 'I love you to someone before'!"

"That was a prank! 3rd year on McGonagall," George protested

"Well, this'll be no different! Except for the fact that now you're not lying," Fred nagged.

"No Fred! She sees me as her best mate's older, irresponsible brother, nothing else!"

'Tell me then George, how can she always tell us apart? You know that we look exactly the same, down the the very last freckle. Even mum can't tell."

"You've got a pimple…" George pointed out.

"Wha?"

"Right there, above your nose."

"Have you checked the mirror lately?" Fred smirked.

"Why should I?"

"You have a pimple there too…"

"Oh,"

"So, answer me, why can Hermione tell us apart?"

"Erm… she's smart like that?"

Fred sighed, "We've gone through this George, only our personalities are differed (and even there, just barely) so she must know one of us pretty well to be able to do that."

"Well, I dunno then!"

"George, let me show you a few pictures," Fred hopped off the burgundy upholstered couch to grab a photo album off the bookshelf.

He flipped through the a few pages before finding the one he was looking for.

"Here," he exclaimed while shoving the book in his twin's face.

George stared at last year's Christmas photos. Everyone had been at their house. Harry, Ron, themselves, Hermione, and even Percy, Charlie and Bill.

The first photograph was of George, Charlie and Hermione pelting dozens of snowballs at a cowering Percy. The figures in the picture charged towards the small snow fort, laden with snowballs. The Hermione in the picture tripped over a stray branch and the picture George caught her before gallantly tripping over the same stick and dragging them both into the deep snow, laughing insanely. At this point the picture Percy had cleverly snuck up and pelted them with snow. George sighed happily at the small memory and turned to the next picture.

This one was of himself and Bill looking around stupidly, trying to find the source of the snowballs that were raining down upon them. Above, Ginny and Hermione could be seen sitting quietly up in a tree, occasionally dropping down fistfuls of icy snoe onto the boys below them. George snorted in laughter as the Bill in the photo spotted the girls and chucked a huge snowball at them. The photo Ginny ducked, but the snow hit Hermione full in the chest, and she toppled out of the tree onto… himself.

Fred peeked over George's shoulder at the album, "Not just her best mate's brother, now are you?" he grinned knowingly.

George skipped over the next few pages, "No, I guess not," he replied slowly as he came across a photo in which Hermione and himself were riding double on his new cleansweep, her arms locked fearfully around his waist. He had managed to coax her into flying and she hadn't loosened her death grip on him until they had touched safely back on the ground.

"But she'd never like me like, well, that. She probably just likes me as a brother or something."

"I believe I can prove you wrong there George," Fred grinned, "let me show you my…personal favorite."

He flipped the page and pointed at a slightly enlarged photograph. This one was obviously taken in the Weasley kitchen, after the snowball fights. Everyone (minus the adults) sat around the creaky wooden table, with pink noses, damp hair, and of course, steaming mugs of hot chocolate.

George stared at the picture for a few moments before turning to Fred, "I don't get it… what's so special about this one? Personally, I like the one where we all gang up on Percy."

Fred smiled and pointed, "Watch Hermione,"

George did as instructed. He watched as the Hermione in the photo sipped her drink slowly, then snuck a small glance at the him in the picture. She did this many more times, George was amazed to realize. He laughed out loud as the picture him took a quick peep at Hermione. The second time hi did this, their eyes met and they quickly turned around blushing.

(A/N: for anyone who forgot…wizard pictures move which is how they're like little movie clips)

Fred shut the album closed and replaced it on the shelf.

"You see?" he chuckled, "I didn't realize it till yesterday, but I think Hermione might be hiding some feelings for you,"

"But still," George began.

"Still what?" Fred cut in, "She had no problem with pretending you two were dating."

"That was a joke, or do you not remember correctly," George scoweled.

"But she didn't hex your guts out like she would've done to anyone else,"

"If she did that, the joke would be ruined,"

"Since when has Hermione cared about that sort of thing?"

"Oh I don't know!" George threw his hands up in the air.

"You said it yourself mate…She kissed you back."

_Alright! hope you liked... review!_

_I've already written the next chapter... I just need to type it! in need of enouragement... getting a bunch of emails telling me to update is a good start! LOL_

_til next time..._

_oli _


	17. Crazed Cutouts

_Wow I am good! Lots of updates this week! 3 i think! go me!_

_okay just some more brotherly arguments here_

_ I had fun with this chapter... a l o t of fun... haha_

_enjoy!_

**Disclaimer: did JK Rowling ever turn students into houselves? no ... she's much too nice... that would be my job... and I do it with pleasure.  
**

**Chapter 17**

**Crazed Cutouts**

"No!" argued George, "No No No No No!"

"Why Not?" demanded Fred.

"Just… NO!"

"We've already been through this! You like her, she likes you! Pull yourself together and ask her!"

"But it's so soon!" George whined.

"Seriously George, today's Thursday… The Ball's on Saturday. You've got two days… unless someone else asks her first…" Fred hinted wickedly.

George's head snapped up, then fell again, his expression riddled with defeat.

Fred sighed at his brother's pathetic state, "You know you'll never forgive yourself if she ends up going with someone else… maybe Harry…or_ Ron_? But I guess that's your problem isn't it?" he stood up and walked out the door, leaving George to contemplate miserably… he'd come around sooner or later…

_0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o_

Hermione stat with Winky admiring the decorations they had just put up. The stair banisters glittered with thousands of sparkling icicles, and mistletoe (not the jinxed type) peeped out over every doorway. Ron and Blumby were probably whipping up all kinds of hors d'oeuvres, to be served at the winter ball, ahead of time and every one seemed to be in a holiday spirit. (well, maybe not the Malfoys)

Hermione sighed, the Winter Ball… she would probably be going alone again this year… or with Ron, which really wasn't that much better. He'd always abandon her when he caught sight of some other pretty girl and she'd sit by herself, wishing she could be out on the dance floor too.

Yes, she was always there when Harry or Ron failed to obtain a nice-looking date… always available… always the very last resort. Except at the Yule Ball with Krum… She'd been the envy of every girl at Hogwarts… until she found out he had just been using her to exact revenge on his ex-girlfriend. She had hexed him so badly when she found out. This year, she would probably be going with Ron… It was already Thursday and most of the girls he'd set his eyes on were already taken…

Harry currently seemed to be eying Ginny (much to Ron's distaste) and as Ginny had always been obsessed about him… it was most likely they would end up going together.

Hermione politely excused herself from the Great Hall and wandered through the corridors to the stairs.

_0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o_

HERMIONE AND GEORGE

SITTING IN A TREE

WILL NEVER EVER EVER BE!

FIRST COMES WHINES

THEN COMES GRUMBLES

GEORGE'LL NEVER FACE ALL HIS TROUBLES!

George whacked the bright pink singing howler (courtesy of Fred downstairs) off his desk angrily and sent it cart-wheeling into the trash. He went back to studying the spots on his ceiling while trying desperately to find a way to ask Hermione to the Ball without seeming the idiot.

Two minutes later, another Howler arrived. It spat out a picture of Hermione sitting alone on the stairs, knees drawn in to her chest.

"See?" boomed Fred's voice, "She's not going with anyone yet. Since when have you been afraid to embarrass yourself? Go now! Before ickle Ronniekins asks her 'cause he can't find anyone else! Wow I feel like your look-alike guardian angel or something-"

The letter and photo was swept into the rubbish bin like the last one.

"Give it up Fred!" George bellowed, "I'm not going and you can't make me!"

"NEVER!" Fred yelled back from downstairs, "This is actually quite fun! Wait 'til you see the next one! It's my absolute favorite so far!"

_'The next one'_ plopped down on his desk a few moments later. Several extremely sloppily cut photograph cutouts emerged from the sickly, bright, purple envelope. George stared at them with disgust. There was a cutout of Hermione, a cutout of himself and a cutout of Ron. Hermione's bushy hair was half chopped off, he himself was missing three fingers, and Ron's arm seemed to be torn off by a clumsy pair of scissors.

The resemblance-bearing scraps of paper wobbled forward towards George on the desk.

"Ohhh nooo!" the Hermione cutout teetered dangerously and Fred's deep voice struggled to sound high and girly, "I have no date for the Winter Ball! Whatever shall I do?"

The Ron cutout stepped forward and immediately, Fred's voice changed to a gruff, retarded sounding one, "I have not found a date either, because of my stupid, git-like qualities. Do you want to go to the Ball with me?"

"Uhh… I guess so since no one loves me… or has the _guts_ to _tell_ me." The Hermione cutout turned up to glare pointedly at George. (The real one… not the cutout)

Fred's voice returned to normal as the George cutout hurled itself from the envelope onto the Ron cutout.

"NEVER! She's mine I tell you! MINE!" Fred's voice screamed through the George cutout as it punched the Ron cutout repeatedly.

The real George watched with a mixture of horror and disgust as the cutout of himself savagely ripped the head off of the Ron cutout. Red paper confetti streamed out of the Ron cutout's decapitated head and George snorted at Fred's… let's just call it_ unique_… ways of expressing himself.

"George! You're my hero!" Fred's voice squealed shrilly from the Hermione cutout, "I love you sooooo much!"

The Hermione cutout tackled the George cutout, "I need you!" she tackled him with two dimensional kisses, "No one ever committed fratricide just for me before! That is soooo sweet!"

George's (the real one) hand reached out tentatively and swiped the 3-inch cutouts into the garbage… but they just didn't shut up.

"George!" Fred's voice screeched, slightly muffled by the trash, "I'll love you forever and ever and ever and ever! I WANT TO HAVE YOUR BABIES!"

"FRED!" George bellowed, "I'M GOING! OKAY? JUST MAKE THAT THING _SHUT UP_!" he trampled down the stairs moodily.

Fred grinned sheepishly, "too much?"

"I think you overdid it at the _I want to have your babies _part," George scowled.

"heh heh, couldn't help myself," Fred waved his wand vaguely and the high-pitched screaming from upstairs stopped abruptly.

George grabbed a fistful of Floo Powder from the chipped flowerpot.

"No worries mate!" Fred encouraged from the couch, "Just be yourself! We both know she'd rather go with you anyday over our Ickle Ronniekins!"

George grinned at his disturbed twin and let the green flames engulf him, "HOGWARTS!"

_yes... as I told you i had fun with that!_

_review and maybe I'll update again soon... but just as a warning... I haven't written or typed the next chapter yet... so it will take considerably longer... s o r r y !_

_Oh and to answer sPinnErs-eNdx 's question... I use characters instead of curses because I don't like to curse and it's a big step for me even to use characters... well kinda... example: #$! _

_til next time! _

_Reviews?_

_the one and only oli _


	18. Knowing the Unknown

_Oh I am just too good..._

_So many updates! LOL_

_you guys had better review for all my hard work! _

**Disclaimer: JKRowling would never get an editor to approve _this_**

Chapter 18

Knowing the Unknown

George stepped cautiously out of the large Hogwarts fireplace… Whoa, Guess Fred's snapshot of Hermione in the Howler wasn't fake. She was sitting right where the photo depicted. In fact, it looked almost as if she hadn't budged an inch since it was taken (how it was taken, George had absolutely no idea… but then again, Fred had his ways). She sat on the bottom steps, hunched into a tight ball, glazed eyes staring blankly into space.

"Hey Hermione!" George approached, "Sickle for your thoughts?"

_Mission: Get Hermione to come to the dance with me……Status: incomplete _

"Huh? What?" Hermione snapped out of her trance, "Oh! Hi… George. What is you doing here?"

George grinned, anticipating the question, "Well… It has come to my attention that a certain girl, who is sitting right in front of me transformed into an elf, is currently without a date for the upcoming Winter Ball!"

Hermione's cheeks flushed a bright crimson color and George continued on, encouraged by her ever slight reaction.

"And I have _graciously_ taken it upon myself to make sure that she is not, once again, subjected to the boorish companionship of a certain younger brother… So, Hermione Granger… will you come to the Winter Ball with me?" George smiled endearingly and slid a single, pure white rose from his sleeve. He held it out for Hermione and hoped dearly that she would accept it.

Hermione's mind reeled with the sudden question. George just asked her to the ball? Did he really fancy her or was it just some joke he and Fred threw together? No…they wouldn't toy with her emotions so carelessly…would they? And if he was being sincere, did she share the same feelings as he did for her? What would Ron do when he found out?

A mixture of ecstasy, doubt, hope, and confusion clouded her usually clear and logical mind, rendering it near impossible for her to think. She felt like she needed hours upon hours to consider this… yet she barely had a few fleeting moments before an answer would be expected.

"Umm…well…" she searched the cracked stone floor for even a hint of a possible response. Finding no answers to her dilemma there, she gazed upwards… right into George's eyes.

Bad, bad mistake…If she was even barely able to think before, there was absolutely no chance now. He steadily held her gaze and her heart pounded dangerously, but she was unable to move. His sparkling blue eyes, the ones she had known for so long, but never really noticed, held only the deepest sincerity, brimming with sheer hopefulness. At that moment, she knew there was only one answer she'd ever think of giving.

"Okay."

_Yup... majoy AWWWWW chapter... reviews please?_

_lotsa reviews equal update by or before Thursday! LOL nice incentive huh?_

_-oli _


	19. Never Doubt the Great Fred Weasley

_okay... another kinda short chapter... but at least I updated so much this week! lol_

_the next one will be longer, I promise... just don't expect it until at least next week... sorry! I have to do my English project and my History project this weekend _

_I dedicate this chapter to my guinea pig Skippy... because I can_

**Disclaimer: It doesn't belong to me... It doesn't belong to JK Rowling... It belongs to Skippy 'cause you can't sue a guinea pig! haha _eat that!_ Lol ... might be a good time to start ignoring me and just reading the story... heheh**

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Chapter 19

Never Doubt the Great Fred Weasley

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_Mission: Get Hermione to Come to the Dance With Me..._

_…Status: Complete!_

George beamed and his mind erupted in happiness and relief. He felt as if he'd go insane. He wanted to catch the next port-key to America, climb to the very tip of their state Empire building or whatever it was called, and jump (with a parachute of course), while shouting to the world, "She said YES! She said YES!"

But he didn't, instead he scooped the small elf, that was also the love of his life, off her feet into a tight embrace, pirouetting madly around the staircase.

Hermione clung tightly to George's neck,; she was dizzy with happiness, and of course because they were spinning so fast. Yes, she had known the right answer, all along in fact, she just had to find it.

Finally George gently placed her back on the stairs and tucked the long stem of the rose between her fingers. Hermione vaguely noticed that the very edges of the petals had blushed an extremely light shade of carnation pink.

"Thanks Hermione, this means so much to me," George paused as if considering something, "And I guess Lee'll really have something to talk about now , eh" he laughed, "I almost feel sorry for him… almost."

Hermione smiled but stared curiously down the hall as soft footsteps were heard in the distance. George gazed down wistfully at her, "Well, I suppose I'd best be going now… don't really belong here like I used to. I'll see you on Saturday then?"

Hermione nodded happily. He embraced her once again, quickly, but warmly and strode over to the fireplace. He procured a handful of Floo Powder and dropped it to the iron grate shouting, "The Burrow!"

He waved as his body disintegrated into the emerald tongues of flame, his voice lost in the swirling vortex of flames.

**0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o**

Hermione stared in dazed wonderment into the empty brick fireplace George had disappeared in. Had that really just happened" Or was it only her mind, playing cruel jokes on her? No… why else would she be holding a rose? It was proof of what she had told him.

The thin, bushy haired elf rose from the stone-slab steps and followed their winding dustiness upstairs. She wandered down a few corridors and up another flight of stairs before finally reaching the portrait.

"Password?" the fat lady asked matronly.

"Pygmy Puff."

"Quite right dear," the picture swung open and Hermione entered the common room. She hopped up the stairs to her dormitory in search of a glass for the rose. After digging through her trunk for a bit, she managed to extract an old, but beautiful, tall glass vase she had previously used to hold quills.

Hermione blew the thick layer of dust that had collected in the crevices off and placed the rose, along with a few centimeters of water carefully into it.

It had undoubtedly earned the place on her bedside table, the sun from the window behind warming its perfect leaves and petals. She stepped back to admire it and the pink tinge around the petals' edges seemed to drip gradually downwards, bathing the upper-half of the rose in a pretty pinkish glow.

**0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o**

"I did it!" George yelled into the quiet house, "She said yes!"

"Told-ja!" Fred popped up from behind the couch, "Never doubt the Great Fred Weasley… For he is _always_ right."

"Yeah… except for the time we got lost in the Forbidden Forest and followed_ your_ directions… where'd we end up again? Oh yeah… I remember! Almost_ eaten_ by Aragog's mutant spider children!"

"hmm… s'pose you're right…"

"And the time you made us hide in the vanishing cabinet to get away from Filch… couldn't bloody get out for over seven hours."

"you could be right there too…"

"yes… and when we used your idea for sneaking into Snape's ingredients cupboard… detention for a month that got us!"

"yeah I get the point! But I_ was_ right this time _wasn't_ I?"

"Yes… that you were Fred… That you were…."

"And you will bloody_ worship_ me for it!"

"Nope."

"Awww…It was worth a try though."

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_ok! review! let's get to 100!_

_Oh and also... I need ideas for the winter ball! couples, clothes, pranks, elves, food, decor... ANYTHING!_

_I am seriously somewhat of a social outcast and have no clue whatsoever!_

_yes... okay ... let's see... review, suggest stuff, and I will try to finish my icky projects and update again soon!_

_lol_

_-oli _


	20. Life is Good

_I love Snow Days! I Love Snow Days! I Love Snow Days! _

_And you should too! Because that is why you have an update!_

_And also why I finished my english project so I could give you an update!_

_So hope for snow again tomorrow and you'll get another update! heheh wouldn't count on it though... s'not snowing anymore... just icy... and cold... and slushy... Which is why I'm sitting here inside typing and most likely annoying the crap out of whomever is reading this... soo why don't we just get to the disclaimer now shall we... followed by the rendom quotieness... followed by the story_

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_**Disclaimer: Oh the weather outside is frightful, but the computer is soo delightful, and if you've no place to go... let it snow.. let it snow... let it snowww... **

**Oh yeah... and I'm NOT JKRowling so there!**

_Random Quote of the Day: _'Aliquid Ardet'_  
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_which translates to '_something's burning

_Yay! go fire! _

_Also this chapter is dedicated to Rutu... cause she is the all-seeing-sock... ok don't ask... just keep reading... _**;P**

_...Oh and Harry's thoughts are in italics_**  
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Chapter 20

**Life is Good**

Dobby grinned and pulled a hideous plaid orange and brown sock from behind the washing machine (which Dumbledore had charmed to work with magic instead of electrical power).

"Look Harry Potter! What Dobby is finding!"

"Oooohhh!" Harry pretended to be excited while backing slowly away from the moldy looking garment, "very nice sock Dobby, I think that is being the thirty-eighth unmatched sock you is finding so far."

He looked reproachfully over at the growing pile of oddly shaped or patterned socks that looked as if they had been lost purposely for a reason. Most of them were either rotting, moldy, covered in something nasty, deformed or just gross. He didn't want to hurt Dobby's feelings, but finding discarded socks around the laundry room to wash, was just not at all on his list of priorities.

"Dobby, maybe we should just be washing them all now?" Harry suggested hopefully.

"Oh no oh no!" Dobby replied scandalized, "there is still might being more socks yet to find!"

Harry sighed, the odor of the socks was starting to affect his respiratory systems and make him nauseous. How Dobby could possible stand the horrid stench was beyond him.

"What if people is needing their socks clean now?" he tried.

A look of newfound comprehension dawned on the obsessive elf's face.

"Maybe Harry Potter is being right! We's should be washing socks right now!"

He turned to the reeking sock pile and one by one, lovingly placed them into the washing machine.

Three hours later, which consisted mostly of washing, drying and folding socks, a dazed Harry stumbled out of the laundry room followed by an extremely cheerful Dobby. Dobby had insisted that they fold the socks in a special, and extremely intricate way, and redid every pair that Harry dared to even touch, telling him repeatedly that he was doing it wrong. The elf had finally agreed to stop for the day because Harry was looking about ready to regurgitate his last meal.

As soon as Harry stepped out of the dank laundry room, a waft of cool, fresh air blew past, instantly refreshing him. Dobby now looked humorously morose, most likely experiencing separation anxiety from his beloved socks (Although he was wearing one knee-high, fuzzy orange-and-blue polka-dotted sock, and another fuchsia pink crew sock with horrendously sparkly silver pom-poms).

Harry gazed thoughtfully out of a large icicle glistening window… and turned to see a blur of fiery red, cross his vision.

_Ginny… Oh no! I haven't asked her to the ball yet! What if someone else already has?_

_Well, guess better late than never right?_

_No! of course not! Who invented that stupid line anyways?_

_Well I've gotta at least ask!_

_You'll make a fool of yourself!_

_Well I've always managed to make a fool of myself anyways, so what's one more time going to do to me?_

_Touché…_

_Wow, never knew I had dual personalities…_

"Hey Dobby?" Harry asked aloud, returning from his thoughts, "Can I meet up with you a little later? Erm… I've gotta go take care of something."

"Okay Harry Potter! Dobby will go sock searching!"

"Ehh… have fun then…"

"Oh Dobby will! Dobby will indeed!"

Dobby bounced off in the other direction, leaving Harry to approach the youngest Weasley alone.

"Hi Ginny! What is you doing?"

She spun around, knocking the spray bottle of _MadamCleen's Cleeneezy Window Cleaner_ off the window ledge she was standing on.

"Oh Harry, I is having to clean windows today. What has you been doing?"

"Dobby is insisting on washing all of socks in Hogwarts," he sighed, wrinkling his nose in disgust.

"Ewww…" she agreed.

"Uhh… Ginny?

"Yeah?"

"Is you going with anyone to the ball yet?"

………_Oh crap! I sound like a complete idiot and smell like a dirty sock…_

"Erm… no."

………_Yessss!_

"Will you go with Harry then?"

……….._Please say yes! Please say yes!_

Ginny's face sparkled with happiness as she pounced from the stone ledge onto him.

"I was thinking you never would be asking,"

Harry stumbled and they both tumbled to the stone floor in a hopelessly jumbled heap, Ginny coming to lie atop Harry, their noses almost touching.

"Oh, but I did," Harry grinned as she blushed, and in a burst of the renowned Gryffindor courage, pulled her down to himself, their lips touching tentatively at first, but then returning quickly with a rediscovered passion.

……… _Life is too damn good………_

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Okay hope you liked! review!_

_and I still need Ideas for the ball! Especially Ron's date, any sort of pranks that happen during the ball, and stuff like that!_

_til next time_

_-oli _


	21. Present Planning

_okay... nuther chapter for you...also thanks to imhypetypeulating who was my 100th reviewer!_

_yay!_

_also much thanx to moony066, MotherCrumpet and jadz98 for being the only ones to review for chapter 20... "hint hint to the rest of you"_

_Yay to them!_

_okay... on with the chapter... And Review this time!_

**Disclaimer: Awww you actually think I'm jkRowling? That's so sweet! yet somehow... not true**

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**Chapter 21**

**Present Planning**

Hermione groaned tiredly as she crawled into her soft four poster bed and under her sky blue comforter. It had been a very trying, stressful, but also absolutely wonderful day.

Winky had kept her hard at work, however kindly. The two had, after finishing their decorations, scrubbed what seemed to Hermione, like every inch of the Great Hall clean… by hand. And the Great Hall really was very large.

Well at least during that horrid trial, Hermione had a little something to keep her going. Just mere hours ago, George had asked her to the ball. As the delicate skin on her knuckles began to bleed, due to the harsh cleaner, she thought of George. How she wouldn't have to go with Ron. How their first kiss at the shop had come about. How if she didn't keep scraping the stiff bristles of the soapy brush against the cold flagstones, she wouldn't be able to go to the ball as a human.

Hermione snuggled deep into her pillow just faintly hearing the gossiping voices of Lavender and Parvati two beds away.

"And I even is having to clean all the bookshelves! No magic! I think I is breaking four nails!"

"four?" Lavender gasped, horrified.

"Yes, it is being horrible! Utterly horrible!"

"But at least we was getting to go on a errand to Hogsmead, but also going shopping for Christmas gifts!"

Hermione's eyes sprung open. Presents! How could she forget? Well, she had already gotten Harry and Ron gifts, (the usual sweets and quidditch supplies) but what about everyone else? What about Ginny and Dobby and Winky… and George? What about George? Ginny, Dobby and Winky should be fairly easy enough, but what to get George?

_Perhaps some sort of prank or joke perhaps? But no, he has a whole store full of that!. It has to be different, unique, funny, but meaningful._

She had a slight hint of an idea, but decided to figure it out in the morning. One thing was certain though, she would have to make it herself, because they most definitely did not carry it in any stores she knew of.

Lavender and Parvati's voices faded into nothingness and Hermione's eyelids fell closed under the moonlight shining through from the window.

0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o

"Are you getting her anything?" Fred asked George, who was sitting cross-legged on his bed, browsing through a weathered copy of _Quidditch through the Ages_.

"huh?" George looked up to see Fred's face hanging upside-down from the top bunk.

"Like, for Christmas?"

"Uhhmmm, I don't know… should I?"

"Duh!"

"Oh that's bloody great! I don't know what girls like!"

"Well Hermione's not really your typical girl now is she?"

"Yes! And that makes it all the harder! And Christmas is only 3 days away!"

"Uhh… you could get her a necklace or something."

"Have you ever even once seen Hermione wearing jewelry?"

"Guess not then… A book maybe?"

"She's probably already read every book that can be bought in Hogsmead."

"why're you always so pessimistic eh George? How about a picture frame?"

"That might work… but how will I ever choose a picture?"

"Always with the pessimism… Just make copies of some from last Christmas."

"Yes, but there's so many…" George trailed off.

He jumped off his bed and propped himself up against the frame of Fred's top bunk in a swift motion that seemed to come from nowhere. The little light bulb above his head flickered wildly, every color of the rainbow blinking rapidly as he breathed, "I'll put together a scrapbook…It'll be absolutely perfect."

Fred inched away from the exuberant face of his brother that was peeking at him from below.

"Are you absolutely sure you're George? Usually, you see, he's quite…pessimistic… and not so…bouncy…or _Obsessive!_" Fred grinned, "Aren't you glad I made you ask her?"

George smacked Fred's smirking face and jumped back down to his bed, "I'm _not_ obsessive!" he protested loudly.

"Course not," Fred yawned, his voice laced with sarcasm, "G'night,"

"Night," replied George, completely oblivious to his brother's tone.

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_Okay! I updated a whole day earlier than I planned to, so review!_ _or else! _

_Or Else what? you may ask?_

_Or Else I won't update the next chapter! muahahaha_

_well I probably will, but just pretend you don't know that and click the lil' blue button... and I'll update all the faster_

_till next time_

_-always and ever _

_ Oli _


	22. Rebuffing Ron

_Oh aren't you just soooo lucky I updated again!_

_also... cookie for anyone who can translate the random latin quote of the day..._

_Catapultam habeo. Nisi pecuniam omnem mihi dabis, ad caput tuum saxum immane mittam..._

**Disclaimer: minime, non curo **

_nice long chapter... enjoy!_

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**Chapter 22**

**Rebuffing Ron**

Hermione's eyes opened and she blinked sleepily. Friday – maybe she'd change back to her human form today. Hopefully… she really did despise being an elf. It was just so… strange. She yawned widely and stretched before hopping out of bed. She pulled on her shrunken black school robes and padded down the winding stairs to the common room to see Harry bounding down the boy's stair, taking them three at a time.

"Has you seen Ron?" he gasped, taking large breaths of air.

"Uhh…No…Maybe he is already going to the Lesser Hall to eat?"

"But he is _always_ waking us first!"

"Let us be going to check anyways,"

"Okay," Harry sighed in defeat.

They walked down to the Lesser Hall in an anxious silence. Not once in his school career had Ron ever failed to wake them for breakfast…It was just…suspicious.

They entered the busy hall and sat down at a table, scanning the place for any signs of Ron.

Moments later, who should appear, but Ron! He sauntered over, obviously pleased with himself, carrying a large platter, a puffy white chef hat perched precariously atop his curls.

"Ron is waking up extra early to be making breakfast!" he answered before they could ask. "Look! Eggs_ and_ sausage!

He put the plate down on their table and plopped down on a third stool. He then pulled a plate towards him and filled it with his… let's just call it his "creation".

The "eggs" seemed to wobble unnaturally and had sharp looking pieces of white scattered about, while the "sausage" sat slimy and pink to the side.

Ron stuffed his mouth with "food" and looked up expectantly at his friends

"Well" Isn't you wanting to try it?"

"Umm, I'm not really being hungr.." Hermione began until she saw the hurt expression that crossed Ron's face, "but I'll try a bit just cause you made them."

Ron beamed.

"Erm… I guess I'll have some too them," Harry sighed, looking longingly at the waffles that graced the table mere meters away.

Hermione spooned the smallest amount of "egg" that she possible could onto her plate, while Harry cut off a bit of "sausage".

She winced as her teeth crunched down upon hard egg shells, but managed to choke out, "delicious," while simultaneously trying not to puke.

Seeing her reaction, Harry wisely waited until Ron turned the other way to flick his "sausage" into a nearby potted plant.

"Yes, delicious," he agreed, patting his rumbling stomach, "but I could hardly eat another bite."

Hermione glared and sullenly mouthed, "cheater…"

Ron looked at them, "You don't want anymore?"

"Well we're both really full from dinner last night," Hermione supplied almost too quickly.

"Not everyone has a never-ending stomach like yours, you know," Harry teased.

"Hmm… guess you're right," Ron speared a wormlike sausage and returned to gobbling his horrid excuse for food.

After "breakfast" Ron bid Harry and Hermione adieu, as he had to get back to the kitchen to help prepare refreshments for the Ball the next day.

"I do hope Blumby is keeping a eye over Ron's cooking," Hermione sighed, as she scooped up two rolls from a nearby table and tossed one to Harry.

"Remind me to be checking my food tomorrow," Harry agreed and bit hungrily into the soft golden bread that Ron had definitely not made.

After scarfing down their rolls, Harry went off in search of Dobby, and Hermione of Winky.

Hermione softly tread the well-known path to the school library, where Winky had asked to meet her. As she passed under the familiar archway, Hermione spotted Winky, already hard at work, sorting through a towering pile of books.

Hermione beamed happily, this was just the sort of work she enjoyed the most. She said hello to Winky and joined her, gladly categorizing the various titles. The two worked in a comfortable silence for an hour or two, flipping through yellowed pages, then slipping away briefly to place the bound pages in their designated spot on one of the many mahogany bookshelves.

Hermione's eyes slid over a partially torn page to come to a halt on the words, 'Draught of timely Invisibility'. She peeked at the cover, 'Most Potent Potions,' no wonder she hadn't read this particular page before. This book belonged in the restricted section, and she'd only looked at it fleetingly once or twice before. Hermione returned her attention to the paragraph following.

'The Draught of Timely Invisibility is a fairly unknown potion, due mainly to the inconvenience. The being to become invisible must be completely submerged in order for the potion to have the desired effects. If brewed, as directed below, the recipient of the draught may become invisible at will due to the…"

Hermione had already snatched up a spare piece of parchment and was scribbling away quickly, occasionally referencing back to the directions and list of ingredients. It was a simple potion really, she was surprised it was even in this book. It looked more like an assignment to be given to a first year. Nevertheless, she noted every small detail, and tucked the parchment into her pocket, just as Winky returned from behind the far shelves.

Smiling slightly when their eyes met, Hermione rose from her seat and headed off to the restricted section with 'Most Potent Potions' under her arm. She passed under the foreboding iron archway and scanned the titles as she searched for the spot where the blood-red leather bound book she carried, belonged. Her finger came to rest upon a slightly emptier few inches of shelf, and she slid the volume neatly in.

Upon returning to the once-towering stack of books, Hermione found that only two remained and they were in Winky's arms.

"Oh Hermione! Why isn't you be taking the rest of today off? Well until at least 5 o' clock. Then all elfses is needing to be in the Great Hall for preparing for the Ball being tomorrow."

"Thanks you Winky!" Hermione smiled. As much as she loved books, this would give her some extra time to start on George's Christmas gift.

She bounded out of the library and immediately collided with someone, sending her sprawling into the doorframe.

"Oh! Sorry Hermione!" Ron apologized, quickly helping her from the floor, "I has been looking around for you all of the day!"

"Oh…why?" Hermione asked, dreading the answer.

"Would you be going to the ball with me?" He beamed at her, clearly expecting her to leap into his arms with joy.

"No," Hermione relished the word as it rolled off the tip of her tongue, "Sorry Ron," and she really was, even though it was actually his own fault.

"but…but…but," he stammered, "Why not?"

"Someone else is asking me already," a smile crept onto her face, "and I is saying yes."

"Who!" he demanded."

"Umm…" Hermione bit her bottom lip uncomfortably, "I'd actually be preferring not to be telling."

"Spill!" he growled loudly, his voice echoing off the stone walls.

Hermione quailed slightly from the visibly angry redhead, "You is having to promise not to get too mad though," she compromised.

"Fine!" he spat in response.

"George…" her trembling thread of a whisper entwined the hall in an unrelenting web of silence.

Ron stood, mouth agape, trying frantically to say something. There was no familiar rustle of robes, or even the faintest murmur of winter air. Time stood deathly and silently still, as Hermione readied herself for the burst she knew would come. The longer the wait, the harder the blow. That's just how Ron worked. Three seconds passed…then five…then twelve.

Finally Ron spoke, "George? Being my _brother,_ George?"

"yes"

"Is he even_ allowed_ to the ball? He's not even being a_ student_ anymore!" Ron's voice grew increasingly louder with each syllable, "You've ruined it! I have no one to be going to the ball with now! I'll have to be going alone! It's not being fair! And it's all your fault!" his fists clenched and unclenched, nails leaving cruel white marks in his palms.

Hermione glared daggers at him, "First off," she snarled, "George is begin allowed to go. Second, you is not owning me! I is going to the Ball with whomsoever I is wanting! And last, it is definitely not being my fault that you are being so shallow. If you wait so long to ask someone, they might be saying no! You should be going to asking Hannah or Eloise or someone who is not already taken instead of blaming me!"

She spun on her heel and stalked off, leaving Ron to mutter curses to the empty hallway.

Well that wasn't as bad as she feared it would be. Usually Ron's temper was much much worse. In fact, Hermione considered herself rather lucky this time, as she hadn't had to put him in a full body bind. He just needed some time to blow off steam.

She passed a shiny suit of armor, and turned into a narrow hall. As she walked briskly by a bare spot in the wall, she thought pointedly, 'I need a place to brew a potion… with ingredients, books and equipment.'

After striding past the unnaturally smooth stretch of stone several times, deep in thought, an intricately carved maple door emerged from the wall. The corners of her mouth turned up slightly as she turned the knob and pushed open the door.

The walls of the Room of Requirement were painted a deep crimson color and lined with mahogany bookshelves. About half the shelves were occupied by various potion-making instructional texts and the other half contained every ingredient anyone would even think of dumping into a potion. In the center of it all, a fire crackled merrily underneath a thick, black iron cauldron. Hermione sighed happily and go t to work.

One hour later, she had successfully created a perfect sample of the draught of timely invisibility. Now, she leafed through a large green manuscript entitled, 'Common herbs and their Magical Properties."

"_Oh come on! I know it's somewhere in here!_" she thought, frustrated.

It was a simple plant, but one which would make all the difference in George's gift.

"Ah! That's it! Oleander!"

'A poisonous plant which, when used in potions, allows the effects of the potion to be "stored" in an inanimate object, until needed by the wizard/witch.'

Hermione grinned, "_short, sweet and extremely useful"._

She grabbed the herb off a nearby shelf and sprinkled it between her fingers, into the bubbling cauldron.

The liquid within immediately turned from electric green, to a midnight blue, and Hermione dropped in a few for ingredients she had come up with. Of course she knew that meddling with potions could be risky, but nevertheless, the final additions were mixed in with an air of assurance.

After stirring the now-crimson potion counter-clockwise six times, Hermione reached into her pocket and fished out a long, simple black tie… then promptly chucked it into the boiling potion.

Peering into the thick iron cauldron, Hermione could see the tie floating absently near the surface. After a few moments, the potion seemed to drain from the cauldron… right into the tie.

As it absorbed more and more potion, the long piece of black cloth seemed to wriggle and flail eerily, finally collapsing to the bottom of the cauldron with a wet smack.

Surprisingly enough, when Hermione reached in to retrieve the tie, it was light as a cloud and contained not even a hint of dampness. She waved it around experimentally and it fluttered as any old tie would normally, only giving off a faint shimmer of gold when hit by the light. Hermione smiled and pocketed it… she'd wrap it up later.

0o0o0o0o

George snipped busily away at a copy of an old Christmas photo. His brow furrowed in deep concentration as he applied a sparing layer of some sticky muggle thing he borrowed from his father. He supposed it was called "Elmer's" since that's what the label said, although it did bear a striking resemblance to a tube of lipstick.

Well, it worked pretty well, and that's all that mattered. He stuck the picture in the center of a painstakingly decorated scrapbook page and embellished further with a thin, gold-ink-tipped quill and a few well-though of final phrases.

He had been working on this scrapbook for, he checked the clock (4:34), about three hours now, but it had been well worth the effort. He closed the elegantly simple royal-blue binding of the scrapbook and leaned back on the couch contentedly. It was perfect and Hermione would absolutely love it.

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_okay! I updated... you reveiw! just click the lil blue/purple/periwinkle/indigo/whatever color you think it is since everyone dissagreed when I called it blue, button on the left...okay? everyone happy now? yes? _

_til next time then:P  
_

_oli _


	23. Late? I Think Not!

_'Ello again! Sorry I haven't updated in a while... I was going through a little "Voltaire" moment, which basically means I get all depressed and suicidal and crap... well not suicidal really, just wondering if there's really a point to living... but you probably don't really care. :P  
_

_so to cut to the chase... It's basically really hard to write a comedy/lighthearted story when you're depressed... don't believe me? Go try it! _

_Well that's my life story! you probably just want my fictitious story now right? well you can have it after this brief message..._

**Disclaimer: Prove it:P**

_Random Latin Quote of the Day: (cookie for anyone who translates)_

_"Vescere Bracis Meis" _**  
**

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**Chapter 23**

**Late? I think not!**

Hermione entered her dorm quietly and placed the plain black tie lovingly on her bedspread. She rooted around in her trunk for a bit, before pulling out a large roll of classic red Christmas wrapping paper, dotted with images of evergreens, snowmen and the occasional, 'Merry Christmas'.

She boxed and wrapped the tie quickly and drew a quill out of her drawer.

"_To, George,"_ she scrawled in neat, precise letters

"_Love,"_ her hand trembled violently for a moment, _"Hermione."_

Standing up, she stuck the present back on her bed and grabbed two unusually large, cardboard boxes that sat beside her window. Hermione had bought them by owl-order a few weeks earlier and they had probably arrived sometime while she was busy working in the library.

Hermione pried the first one open and pulled out carious broom-management kits and supplies. It was just so easy to shop for her friends when they were all interested in the same thing… Quidditch.

She divvied the contents of the box into three piles… One for Harry, one for Ginny, and a slightly smaller one for Ron (After all, he had just screamed his lungs out at her, and she felt reasonably justified in holding a slight grudge).

The second box contained a large array of sweets from Honeydukes. Making two more piles, she sorted out a few bags of Bertie-Bott's-every-Flavor-Beans, and four boxes of lemon drops, which she knew Winky and Dobby would enjoy immensely.

On an afterthought, she tossed a mismatched pair of shocking pink and gray socks she'd been trying to get rid of, onto Dobby's pile. After adding a couple more handfuls of sweets to elves' piles, she distributed the rest between Harry, Ron and Ginny's growing piles, turning back to George's box to tie on a few chocolate frogs.

At last, she wrapped up her friends' gifts and stashed them all under her bed (which was actually kept quite clean) for safekeeping.

She glanced at the clock, _'Oh crap, 4:59! I have to go to the Great Hall to help set up! I'll never make it in a minute!'_

Dashing out of her room into the corridor, Hermione skidded down a few flights of stairs and made a mad sprint for the Great Hall. She _would not_ be late. Hermione Granger was _never_ late… even when she was an elf.

Paintings, columns, and window whizzed by, but still she cursed her stubby elf legs. Finally, she burst into the Great Hall panting, just as the Hall's huge clock struck five.

Hermione sighed in relief, oblivious to the concerned stares she was attracting. She finally noticed Harry's pointed look and gazed around the Hall. The only ones present were Harry, Dobby, Winky, Dumbledore, Ginny and herself.

"Where is everyone else being?" she inquired of them, "Isn't they all supposing to be here now?"

"Well, actually no," Harry laughed, "we is just not wanting anyone to being late…They is actually needing to be here in fifteen minutes."

Hermione grumbled something better left incoherent under her breath and plopped down on the lone table next to Ginny. The redhead turned to her, while the others were debating hotly, the true importance of socks, and asked in an excited, but hushed tone,

"Is it being true?"

Hermione sighed, Ginny would figure out eventually, so what the heck, "Is what being true?"

"My brother is asking you to the dance?"

Hermione smiled mischievously, "Which brother?"

"George,"

"Yup,"

"awwww…" Ginny squealed and attacked Hermione in a hug, "we is being like sisters now! I is always wanting a sister!"

"he is taking me to the dance," Hermione scolded lightly, "we is not getting married."

Hermione turned away slightly, but still heard Ginny's faint whisper of, "yet."

"Ginny!"

"What?"

"We're_ not_ married!"

"Yet!" she insisted, and poked out her tongue stubbornly.

"Fine then! But if _I_ is marrying George, _You _is marrying Harry!" she shouted loudly.

Four heads swiveled around to look at them.

"What's this about I is marrying who?" Harry asked mildly.

"Erm… you is best not wanting to know," Hermione fidgeted uncomfortably, while Ginny fought unavailingly to stop a blush.

Once the attention had drifted from them, Hermione asked, "He _did _be asking you, yes?"

"yes," Ginny answered simply, leaving out a few other… _minor_ details.

After a bit, students and elves began filing into the Great Hall. Once everyone had arrived, Dobby, Dumbledore, a few teachers, and Harry directed the group in moving chairs and small tables into the room.

In little more than half an hour, the Hall was filled with small, circular tables on either side, leaving room in the center for dancing, just as it was for the Yule Ball, some time ago.

With a twist of his spindly fingers, the wizened Dumbledore elf conjured dozens of assorted, red or green shimmering table cloths, each one falling gracefully and draping itself upon a table.

Finally, he bid the Hogwarts staff, students and elves good-night and hobbled energetically out of the room. Slowly, everyone trickled out, quickly as they had come.

0o0o0o0o

Hermione sighed tiredly and trudged back up to her dorm. After changing into baggy pajama bottoms and a T-shirt (which she now routinely wore, after her little _run-in_ with Snape in the hall), she collapsed on her thick mattress, glancing over towards the window.

She did a double-take. Hadn't the rose George had given her been white? Bathed in the luminescent glow of pure white moon-light streaming in through her window, the rose was now, undeniably, a beautifully solid, gentle carnation-pink. Hermione blinked in confusion…_ that_ was just strange. But a wave of exhaustion crashed down upon her, stifling any spark of lingering curiosity.

She drifted quickly into a deep slumber, joining the rhythmic snores and breathing of her roommates. Beyond the thick glass panes of her window, wispy white clouds drifted slowly to surround the shining round moon, silently watching over the bare Hogwart's grounds.

* * *

_Okay there's ur chapter... still need ideas! the more ideas you give me, the better the next few chapters will be!_

_and review! please? _

_Oh and to **dfgdfgdgd 0**, who left me a message consisting of just those letters... you're weird... please don't leave reviews in gibberish please! Thank you muchly:) I_ do_ prefer them in english!...or latin I suppose. _

_ And thank you **Cactus 0**, who left me very nice reviews... in _english_ I might add. _

_So please hit the blue/periwinkle/purple/indigo/colored button on the _Bottom_ left (Happy **Riena**?)_ _and leave review!_

_okay ... is everyone happy now?_

_yes? good... Review!_

_til next time then..._

_Oli _


	24. At Last

_Alright, here's another chapter... wow, go me... I didn't think I'd update for at least a week or so... well lucky you!_

**Disclaimer: What's the point anymore... I've already said basically the same thing about 20 different ways... and guess what? nope! still don't own it!**

_Random Latin Quote of the Day:_

_"Utinam barbari spatium proprium tuum invadant!" ... (may barbarians invade your personal space!)_

_and On With the Chapter!_

_

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_

**Chapter 24**

**At Last**

"My clothes are too tight," Hermione mumbles as she blearily opened her eyes and winced at the blinding sunlight pouring into the room.

"Hey Wait! My clothes are too tight? That means…" she peeked under the covers at herself, "I'm me again!"

She leapt out of bed overjoyed… and moments later, heard the inevitable rip. Looking down at her attire, she saw that her once baggy, flannel pants were now skin tight, ripped shorts, and her T-shirt had become little more than a bra with sleeves.

Happily grabbing a folded pile of normal human-sized clothes, Hermione shed her shrunken elf-clothing and darted into the bathroom, claiming the much-sought-after first shower, as her roommates' snores continued.

After the warmest cleansing she had experienced in a long time, Hermione toweled herself dry and donned the plain black T-shirt and jeans she had laid out.

Upon opening the wooden bathroom door, she came face to face with … Ginny. Smiling from under her bright red locks, she blatantly cried the obvious

"Hermione! We're _Human_ again! Isn't it great?"

Hermione nodded in agreement, amusement at her friend's excitement sparkling in her dark hazelnut eyes.

"And guess what that means?" Ginny paused for air, "SHOPPING!"

Hermione groaned, maybe she would have been better off staying an elf, "I'm not going shopping!"

"Yes you are!" the stubborn redhead countered, "you still need a dress for tonight!"

"no I don't!" Hermione protested

"yes!"

"no!

"Yes!"

"No!"

"YES!"

"NO!"

"YES! YES! YES! YES! YES!"

Hermione's shoulders slumped in defeat, "Fine… are you dragging along anyone else?"

"Nope! Just us!" Ginny tossed her hair in victory, "Hey are we the only ones that've changed back to normal?" she peeked at Hermione's dorm mates, " 'cause they still look like elves to me."

"Let's go check Harry and Ron," Hermione suggested tiredly.

Creeping into the common room, the old clock chimed seven. The two friends tiptoed silently into the boys' room, and Ginny clamped a hand firmly over her mouth to suppress giggles. Harry lay half on the floor, half hanging from his bed, his pajama pants ripped open to reveal crimson boxers with golden snitches.

"Well, Harry's back, but Ron's not… Oooh he's not going to like this! Let's leave before they wake up."

She followed Hermione down the stairs, back into the warm common room.

"Ginny," Hermione moaned as she flung herself onto a cushy red sofa facing the fire, "is going shopping _really_ necessary?"

Ginny looked at her as if she'd just asked if breathing was necessary, "yes! I thought we'd already agreed on this," the redheaded witch plopped down next to her, "We're going shopping, and you're getting a dress!"

"Can't I just wear mine from the Yule Ball?"

"No!"

"Why not?"

"Just… NO!"

"Ginny!"

"You're getting a dress today whether you like it or not! Do it for George! Or something…"

"Urgh…I _despise_ clothes shopping… Let's go eat, then get this over with."

"Okay!" Ginny bounced cheerfully off the couch, dragging Hermione towards the Lesser Hall. _All the more time for shopping!_

They made their way to the Lesser Hall, where breakfast was being served, and were faced with an interesting sight. It seemed that, while some students/staff had turned human overnight, most had not. They greeted a human Dumbledore, Neville and Hannah, before sitting down at a now-hopelessly small table.

For the most part, they were able to make do with the tiny plates, goblets and silverware, until Hermione remembered she could now use her want to enlarge them. As they were standing up to leave, a grinning Harry, and a fuming midget Ron approached.

"Hey! You guys are back to normal too!" Harry strode over and uncertainly put an arm around Ginny. She snuggled closer and brushed a light kiss across his cheek, watching his face blush crimson.

Ron growled and spat sarcastically, "Well, it is being nice that _some people_ here is being normal again," He turned and stomped off towards the kitchens… and tripped. Landing on his face with a sickening thud, Ron's elf-body was enveloped in a swirling mist. The cloud grew larger and larger until it finally dissipated and ceased to exist, leaving a lanky, human Ron, lying awkwardly on the floor.

Accepting a hand up from Hermione, he surveyed himself and laughed weakly, "Guess I'll take back what I said then, eh?"

The once again human friends shared a brief laugh over Ron's anger issues, before Ginny turned and headed for Hogsmead, pulling an annoyed Hermione after her. Ron and Harry sat down at the enlarged table to eat, promising to meet the others later at the Three Broomsticks.

Walking out of Hogwarts, Ginny and Hermione passed a scowling old Filch elf looking up at them murderously. They quickened their pace and strode towards Hogsmead through the flurries of a budding snowstorm.

Finally, they came to a halt, panting slightly, in front of the large foggy glass windows which could only belong to Madam Malkin's Robes for all occasions.

Hermione watched a tiny snowflake drift onto her cloak. She sighed heavily and blew it forcefully away, sending it spiraling through the chilly air. It was going to be a_ long_ day.

* * *

_Okay! **Review**! next chapter contains... the ickiest thing to do in your spare time... go **dress shopping!** _

_**review** and I'll **update faster! **probably!_

_also... there's still time for **suggestions**... and does anyone have any good ideas for **pranks **at the ball?_

_thanks and bye!_

_**-oli** _


	25. No Manhandling!

_And now, "the Ginny torturing Hermione by taking her shopping chapter!" better known as the dress shopping chapter!_

_hope you like it... it was mostly based on when my mom took (dragged me screaming from the house) me shopping for a semi-formal dress last year..._

_and thanks to moony066 and MotherCrumpet for the awsum suggestions of pranks to do at the Ball. _

_And now on with the chapter... just after these brief messages... _

**Disclaimer: no (I told you... brief)  
**

_Random Quote (not Latin this time) of the Day:_

_"We don't make mistakes, we make happy accidents" -Quote from Painter Bob in a movie I watched in painting class :P... Seriously, how _wrong_ does that sound?  
_

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**Chapter 25**

**No Manhandling!**

"How about this one?" Ginny held up a periwinkle strapless dress for Hermione to see.

"No,"

"What about this then," she grabbed a silvery-white, floor-length gown.

"no"

"this one's nice"

"no"

"Well this maybe?"

"no"

"well you choose one then,"

"I don't really like any of these," Hermione shifted her weight from one foot to the other uneasily.

"Then just grab some and go try them on!" Ginny sighed in exasperation, shooing her friend into the dressing room, along with a pile of dresses.

A few minutes later, the redhead stood outside the stall, tapping her foot impatiently, "Are you almost done in there?"

"I don't like it," Hermione replied from the other side of the wall.

"Well come out and I'll take a look,"

Hermione stumbled out of the dressing room in a glitzy yellow strapless dress, looking very much out of her element.

"Yeah, you're right… yellow's not really your color… and it's too sparkly," Ginny surveyed her friend critically, "Alright, go back in and try another one.

Two hours and forty-three dresses later, they had still not gotten anywhere.

Hermione scowled and trudged back into the cubicle, dragging the next dress to be tried, on the ground behind her.

"_Please_!" Madam Malkin's irate voice yelled from the other end of the shop, "Do not _manhandle_ my dresses!"

Ginny smiled wryly as Hermione slammed the door, muttering angrily. After a few moments, Hermione emerged once again, wearing a tiny red dress.

"Ginny," she sighed warily, "There is _absolutely no way_ I am wearing _any_ of these dresses in public!" she gestured towards the colorful pile.

"Why not?"

"They're all so… flashy… and skimpy."

Ginny was about to retort, '_So?_' but thought better of it, and instead suggested, "Well why don't we get rid of all the ones you're sure you won't buy, and then you can try on the ones that are left."

So they did just that. Hermione gladly discarded anything that ended above her knees or had no straps, while Ginny sorted out the almost neon colored, eye-blinding dresses.

They were left with a small assortment of simpler, more conservative, much more appropriate gowns. One by one, Hermione tried on and rejected a dark green, a shimmering purple, and a few different black dresses. This whole shopping thing was becoming very trying on her nerves. She donned a midnight blue, velvety halter dress and stepped out of the changing room for Ginny's inspection.

Ginny's eyes swept swiftly over the ankle-length, flowing cut of the gown, and then continued on to note the delicate crystal rhinestones dotted elegantly along the neckline, waist and hem. It looked simply stunning on Hermione, but would take a bit of persuasion to get her to actually buy it.

"Yes… you're getting that," Ginny declared suddenly.

"bu…What?" Hermione stammered, clearly taken aback.

"I said, you're going to buy that one," Ginny replied grinning impishly.

"No… I can't," she fingered the velvety material nervously.

"What's wrong with it?" the redhead inquired, "It can't possibly get any longer without you tripping over it!"

"No… it's just… there's no back," Hermione turned around, proving to her friend that there was indeed no fabric covering her shoulders or upper-back.

Ginny burst out laughing.

"What?" demanded Hermione.

"It's a halter-tied dress!" Ginny giggled, "There isn't_ supposed_ to be a back! Seriously Hermione, this is probably the most conservative dress they have here! It looks gorgeous on you and you _are_ going to buy it!"

"but…"

"no, I don't want to hear it. Just change back into your regular clothes and we can go pay for it,"

Glad to have an excuse to stop modeling dresses, Hermione gratefully changed into her jeans and T-shirt, her back safely covered once more. Once she exited the dressing room, she was more or less dragged, along with the dark blue gown, to the register, by Ginny.

Looking reproachfully at the dress and her widely grinning friend, she pulled a few handfuls of money from the pocket of her cloak and paid Madam Malkin, who chided, "Now don't carry it like that dear, you'll muss the fabric."

Hermione responded with a fierce glare and stomped out the door, purposely dragging the bag on the ground.

"Sorry about my friend," Ginny apologized angelically, as the shop-owner raised a quizzical eyebrow, "She doesn't like dresses much."

"pity," murmured the witch sympathetically as Ginny ran to catch up with Hermione.

"Hermione! Hermione! Wait up!" Ginny yelled, her feet smacking down on the icy, wet cobblestones. Finally, she caught up, her breathing ragged.

"Wanna…go meet… Harry and Ron… Three Broomsticks… now?" she panted, her breath freezing over as it left her.

Hermione agreed happily, making sure to drop the paper bag with the dress in it a few times on the slushy ground for good measure, and they nearly sprinted over, anxious to get inside the warm building.

0o0o0o0o0o

"Oy! George Look!" Fred pointed through the frost-covered window of the shop, "They're human again! Well… at least some of them are,"

George joined Fred at the window peering out at the many Hogwarts students, and yes… elves. Fred suddenly fell to the ground, rolling with laughter.

"Wha! What?" George scanned the crowds trying to find the source of his twin's laughter.

"Malfoys! Tried… haha… wands! Heeheee!"

George instantly located the three Malfoys, who looked rather unpleasantly…_ purple_, bright neon purple.

"Haha!" George landed atop Fred, "They tried to use their wands to change back, again! That's so pathetic! Haha! They of all people should know by now, that the most common side effect of our potions is turning a different color if you try to reverse the effects!"

"Merlin knows we've given them so much over the years. And every-time! Every-bloody-frickin'-time! They always try to counter back, and change colors! Hahaa!"

"To the best test dummies ever!" George conjured up two steaming mugs of butterbeer and took a hearty swig.

"I'll drink to that!" Fred laughed and followed suit.

Emptying his mug, George spotted two figures running toward the Three Broomsticks across the road.

"Hey look! Hermione and Ginny are human again too! It _is _a good day!"

"Amen brother! Amen!" Fred shouted wildly (scaring a few nearby customers), before filling their mugs to the brim once more with the frothy drink.

* * *

_Well thanks for reading! Now REVIEW!  
**Cactus 0**- if no one knows the point then there probably isn't one...which confuses me... and if I continue this train of thought, I will probably end up taking about twenty more lines and boring you and whomever else is reading this with the thoughts that pop into my mind when I think too much... And I have realized that thinking too much is what causes my depression... maybe I should stop thinking... is that even possible?... and I should really stop typing now... goals for life: 1-stop thinking... 2-stop typing_

_ Sorry for the bit of rambling above... if I stop typing withing the next five lines, maybe I'll achieve my second goal of life... but that would mean I could never update again... so I won't... and maybe If I learn how to hibernate I can reach my number one goal, unless dreaming counts as thinking... which in that case, I'll never achieve any of my goals leaving me goaless... aaaannndd I'm rambling again..._

_New Goal of Life... STOP RAMBLING..._

_okay Bye Now! **REVIEW!**_

_-Oli_

_ps- there's still time for prank ideas! hint..hint  
_


	26. Death By Shoe

'Ello again! So sorry I haven't been updating quite as frequently... but I do have an excuse... My english teacher assigned some stupid persuasive essay, so I spent all of yesterday writing crap instead of writing this... and this chapter is really long, 11 pages in Word, so it took forever to write and type up... so yeah... that's my excuse...You guys are probably lucky I even updated today instead of waiting til next weekend... but I just got sooo many nice reviews... and yeah a few strange ones... okay I'll stop rambling now (Oh, and I'm not encouraging you to leave me confusing reviews... leave nice ones that I can understand)

**Disclaimer: yes, no, maybe so**

Random Latin Quote o' the Day:

_Quantum materiae materietur marmota monax si marmota monax materiam possit materiari?_

How much wood could a woodchuck chuck if a woodchuck could chuck wood?

_And now... ON WITH THE STORY! _

_

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**Chapter 26**

**Death by Shoe**

"Hermione!" Ginny whined, "We have to go!"

Hermione flipped a page, eyes still glued to the tiny print, "Why?" She asked calmly, "We've already finished shopping… right?" a hint of alarm seeped into her last phrase.

"But we've been here for almost two hours," she complained, gesturing to the interior of the Three Broomsticks.

Harry and Ron sat at a nearby table gossiping shamelessly like young school girls over how the Malfoys seemed to suddenly be… purple.

Hermione slid a thin red ribbon into her book as a place holder and replied mildly, "Well, we spent just over five hours at that horrid clothes shop, what's wrong with two hours here?"

"I'm bored," Ginny sighed childishly.

Hermione raised an eyebrow,

_What did she think I wasn't at Madam Malkin's?_

"And it's already 3:30! We have to go get ready!"

"Get ready for what?" Hermione sipped her mug of butterbeer.

"The ball!" Ginny chirruped with excitement, "C'mon let's go!" she tugged on Hermione's arm.

Hermione shook her off and moaned, "five more minutes!"

"No! We have to go NOW!"

"But it's not til seven!"

"That only leaves us with," Ginny counted on perfectly painted red fingertips, "Three Hours!"

"You counted wrong," Hermione stated automatically.

"No," protested the fiery redhead, "It takes a while to get back to the castle from here, and it'll take longer if you don't hurry up!"

"Why do you need three whole hours to get ready? Last time I checked, it only took me three minutes to throw on a dress!"

Ginny looked at her dumbly as if she had just admitted to having an affair with both Snape and Percy. After a moment of shocked (and blissful) silence, Ginny figuratively exploded,

"But what about bathing, and hair, and makeup?" Ginny rambled loudly, "and shoes? I still need to pick out my shoes!"

"Well," Hermione said slowly, "I showered this morning, my hair is fine, I don't wear makeup, and I'll just wear those black one-inch heels you made me buy last year."

Once again, Ginny was thrown into a gaping silence.

"Oh, you poor deprived child!" she wailed in horror, quickly recovering from her shock, "This is serious! We have to go right now!

Ginny pulled on her arm, more forcefully this time, and Hermione sighed, picked up her bag, and glanced hopelessly back at Harry and Ron, who shot her sympathetic, better-you-than-me looks, as she was pulled from the cozy building.

0o0o0o0o0o0o

Icy harsh wind made contact with warm skin as the door was blown wildly shut behind them. They trudged towards the castle through the thickening blizzard, huddling deep into their cloaks and scarves. By the time they reached the huge Hogwarts entrance, the snow lay just above their knees, while hands, feet and faces were numb with cold. Entering the entrance hall with pink noses and chapped lips, they made their way up to their dorms.

Upon entering Ginny's dorm room, they shed their damp winter wear and Hermione was shooed into the adjoining bathroom for a bath (regardless of her many protests of having had a shower that morning).

Hermione soaked idly in steaming, scented water, graced with a thick layer of shimmering bubbles that just skimmed the surface. After a few tranquil minutes, she got to work scrubbing every inch of herself clean (even though she had already don't exactly that this morning).

Fifteen minutes later, she cast a quick drying spell on her hair and emerged from the bathroom in a fluffy white terry robe.

"That was fast," Ginny noted with surprise from where she stood by her bed, "I already laid out our outfits for tonight, so while I'm in the bathroom you can go ahead and get changed. Be out in a bit!" She skipped happily into the bathroom, leaving Hermione to examine the dresses draped perfectly over the bed.

Her own was soft and pleasant to the touch, and she traced her finger down a simple design of the white crystal rhinestones. Turing her gaze to the other dress laid out on the bed, Hermione chuckled to herself in amusement. The short, slightly flared crimson dress was, in its entirety, purely Ginny. The somewhat ruffled edges of the bottom were delicately lined in black, as were the thin crisscrossed straps, and the jewelry placed beside matched it perfectly.

_Wonder when she got it,_ Hermione mused thoughtfully, I've _sure never seen it before._

She pondered quietly for a moment before grabbing the dress off the bed. From the flowing blue fabric, a small pile of something silver dropped. Bending down, she recovered a pair of long, dangling earrings, from which hung several sparkling white stones each, along with a matching necklace. She smiled, Ginny had given her the set for her birthday, but she'd never worn them yet, as they seemed just too fancy for everyday wear.

Hermione slipped her gown on over her head and reached back to tie the halter portion. She fumbled with the velvety smooth material and unsuccessfully tried again as the fabric became slippery beneath her fingers.

…_This is not working_

She walked, tripping over the dress's hem a few times, over to the huge mirror on the other side of the room.

…_Maybe… If I turn my head, like this…_

She tilted her head awkwardly.

…_I can just see the bloody frickin' knot_

A shock of unruly hair fell into her face

"Stupid… hair… idiotic… design… for a dress," she muttered in frustration.

Try as she might, she simply could not get the knot to stay put in one place.

"Need some help?" a familiar voice asked from the doorway.

Hermione whirled around, her fist clutching the fabric tightly behind her neck.

"George!" she cried in alarm, "How'd you get up here? What if I wasn't dressed?"

"I levitated myself, and it wouldn't've bothered me" he grinned cheekily.

Before she could respond, he crossed the room and gently pried the dark blue velvet ties from her rigid grasp. Nimble fingers swiftly worked to knot the two ends together, sending shivers rippling out from where they lightly brushed against bare skin.

He tied the fabric securely behind her neck, the excess material falling gracefully between her shoulder blades, and his hands lingered only a few moments longer than necessary.

"Thanks…" Hermione murmured uncertainly, reaching up to tug the knot experimentally.

"Anytime," George grinned.

"Hey Hermione! Would you pass me my dress?" Ginny's muffled shouts still permeated through the bathroom door.

"I'd best be going," George smiled endearingly, "see you in a couple hours."

He kissed her swiftly on the lips and exited the room.

"Hermione!" Ginny poked her head out of the bathroom, could you pass me my dress?"

"Oh… yeah, okay," Hermione snapped out of her blissful state and handed her friend the deep red dress.

"Thanks," Ginny ducked back into the bathroom.

"You're welcome," Hermione sat slowly down on the bed and reached out to lift the silvery jewelry from the small mahogany table.

She poked the sparkling earrings through her earlobes and fastened the clasp to her necklace. She then grabbed Ginny's battered copy of Hogwarts A History and flopped down on her stomach upon the bed, immersing herself in the worn text.

0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o

Five minutes later, Ginny stepped from the bathroom.

"Hermione!" she moaned in exasperation.

"What?" Hermione put down the huge book and rolled dramatically off the bed.

"You got your dress all wrinkled!"

Hermione looked down at her crumpled outfit, "So? I can fix it." She tapped the velvet blue ham with her wand and the wrinkles obediently pressed themselves smooth, "See?"

"Alrighty then, I'm going to go pick out my shoes." The bright redhead skipped over to her huge closet and began pulling shoes from it.

"Hey Ginny! When did you get that dress? I've never seen it before," Hermione leaned against the doorframe of the closet.

Ginny grinned, "The day after they announced the ball."

She pulled a strappy pair of sky-high heels from beneath a box, "here try these on,"

"But I'm wearing the black one-inch heels," Hermione protested as the pointy shoes were flung at her.

"The ones I made you buy last year?"

"yes,"

"No way, they are just too low. I made you buy those for a small dinner party, not a ball!"

"Well, I'm not wearing these!" Hermione dangled the dangerous looking stiletto heels in Ginny's face.

"Yeah you are!"

"If I do, I'll trip down a staircase, break my ankles, and crack open my skull!"

"Ooohh, very pleasant images 'mione," Ginny rummaged further into the closet.

"I'm not wearing them!"

"Alright, alright, how about these?" Another pair was chucked at her, this time making contact with her face.

"What is this! Torture Hermione in a dress store then kill her with a shoe day?" she shrieked.

Hermione gingerly rubbed her cheek where the heel had hit her and threw both pairs of shoes back at her friend.

"Sorry!" Ginny called from the back of the closet.

"I'm wearing my low-black shoes!" Hermione yelled stubbornly, "I'll be back in a minute,"

She ran barefooted to her shared room next door.

0o0o0o0o0o0o0o

Lavender and Parvati (now human) were sitting in front of the gilded, circular mirror, their makeup and hair-care products lined messily upon an intricately painted white table.

"Hermione!" Lavender cried, "Your dress is soooo pretty!"

"Thanks," Hermione began to dig through her trunk, "Your dresses are really nice too."

Lavender's dress was a strapless light… well lavender color, and Parvati's was a poufy lemon yellow with a plunging neckline.

"So Hermione, tell us," Parvati globbed a thick layer of white powder across her best friend's face, "Are you really going with George Weasley?"

"Erm…" Hermione shifted uncomfortable, "yes." She spotted the strap of one of her shoes and pulled frantically.

"Oh..My..God!" Lavender squealed, "he is soooo hott! You are the luckiest girl ever!"

"Better not let Ron hear you say that," Parvati chided as she applied a neon pink blush.

"Oh," Lavender scoffed, "Ron knows whatever we once had is so over. This is just kind of… whatever."

"So you're going with Ron then?" Hermione asked, eager to change the topic from George and herself.

She pulled hard on the shoe and it finally burst out from beneath the Monster Book of Monsters, which growled and snapped in annoyance.

"Yeah," Lavender replied nonchantly, "No one else asked me, and I sort of felt sorry for the guy."

"Didn't that Creevey kid ask you though?" Parvati asked.

"Oh right," Lavender rolled her heavily lined eyes, "but he hardly even counts. He's not even in our year and is kind of gross really. Always obsessing over Harry, maybe he's gay. Anyhow, I'd take Ron over him any day."

Hermione murmured sympathetically as she dug deeper into her trunk, desperate to find her second shoe and get away before they tried to "make her pretty".

"Hermione, you absolutely _have_ to let us do your makeup!" Parvati gushed, smearing a tube of sparkly purple gunk over Lavender's mouth.

_Too late…_

"well, uhh…" Hermione stammered, yanking feverishly at the second shoe she had just spotted.

"Oh, come on!" Lavender pleaded as her lashes were heavily doused in purple mascara, "Please? See how nice Parvati made me look?"

In all truthfulness, Lavender's heavily made up face reminded Hermione of a first year's art project. She shuddered involuntarily.

…_Must get out of here at all costs…Desperate times call for desperate measures…_

"Well, uh, I actually already promised Ginny she could."

"Oh," Parvati looked extremely put out.

The second shoe was persuaded, if somewhat forcefully, to unhook from the yarn of a very old mitten. Hermione grabbed both shoes triumphantly and fled the room.

"Bye! See you guys later!" she called back, before they could start bugging her about her bushy hair.

…_Yes! Free at last! Well, sort of…_

Hermione sprinted the three feet back to Ginny's room.

0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o

"What took so long?" The redhead demanded, "It's already 5:30!"

"I couldn't find my shoes and Lavender and Parvati tried to get me to let them do my makeup."

Ginny scowled, "Those two have no idea how bad they are at doing makeup. They're usually really stubborn though. How'd you get away?"

Hermione sighed, knowing the consequences of her next sentence, "I told them I'd already promised you, that you could do it."

Ginny's face lit up, "Well then," she smiled maniacally, "Since that's what you promised, I expect no complaints or arguments. Here, sit down and we can get started," Ginny motioned towards a padded stool.

Hermione groaned and plopped onto the stool, letting her shoes drop onto the floor beside her.

Ginny's eyes flashed from the shoes to Hermione's stoically black face, and back to the shoes again. Instructing Hermione to close her eyes, Ginny muttered a spell under her breath and the plain black heels of the shoes grew a bit taller and much thinner. She added a few white rhinestones to match the dress, with a flick of her wand, then retrieved her makeup kit and began on Hermione.

"Not so much makeup please?" Hermione begged, as Ginny began to apply a very light blush.

"Now, what did we say about complaining? Didn't you make a promise?" Ginny scolded playfully.

"Yes mum," Hermione relapsed back into silence.

0o0o0o0o

An hour later, Ginny handed Hermione a mirror.

"That's not me," she insisted flatly.

"Yes it is!"

"My hair is a bushy mess… not… this," Hermione wound a sleek curl of shiny brown hair around her finger.

"It is you Hermione," Ginny sighed with a smile, and began applying her own makeup.

"But I don't look this nice in real life,"

"Makeup makes the world go round," the redhead smiled as she wiped on a bit of red lipstick.

"Whatever you put on my lips is really sticky," Hermione's hand reached up to touch it.

"Don't Touch It!" Ginny ordered loudly, "The stickiness will go away on its own in a minute or so, just _don't touch it_!"

Hermione dropped her hand as if she'd been stung, "fine… fine…"

She swung her legs in boredom, watching Ginny expertly apply shadow. Her eyes wandered and fell upon her shoes beside her.

"You changed my shoes!" she accused.

"Yup!" Ginny grinned, "And the spell works so only I can turn them back, so don't even try it,"

Hermione's outstretched arm holding her wand lowered from the shoes, "Turn them back!" she demanded.

"Nope! You're either wearing those, or the 'tripping-down-a-stair-case, ankle-breaking, skull-cracking ones'." Ginny applied the finishing touches to her makeup and stepped into a pair of tall, strappy red and black shoes.

Hermione remained silent.

"Oh Hermione!" she cajoled, "I didn't make them too high. It's just an inch or so taller. Just put them on. George and Harry will come any minute!"

"But he's already here," Hermione blurted.

"Who?" Ginny's head snapped up from fastening the straps of her shoe.

"Oh… er… George,"

Ginny's eyes gleamed wickedly, "Where?" she asked. Something was definitely up.

"Well, he was here for a bit, then left… so I don't really know anymore."

"And where was I?" she asked slowly, watching Hermione fidget.

"uhh… bathroom."

"Alright, I think I've had enough. I really don't fancy hearing about anything you and my brother did in here while I was in the bathroom," she put on her other shoe and smirked, "my bed isn't contaminated is it?"

"GINNY!"

"alright, calm down girl, I was only checking… And that does mean 'no' right?"

"GINNY! I did not DO anything with your brother in this bedroom!"

"Well, that's a good thing," the door opened to reveal George and Harry, both grinning widely, "Cause if you did, I'd have to kill them… unless it was me of course," George smiled angelically at a still-fuming Hermione.

"Ginny, you're beautiful," Harry murmured as she walked into his arms.

"You guys all set to go?" George asked, "Fred and Katie already left for the Great Hall."

"Let me just put my shoes on," Hermione scowled at the transfigured heels, but nonetheless, put them on.

Taking George's offered arm, she stumbled clumsily out of the room, after Harry and Ginny.

0o0o0o0o0o0o

"George's eyes hungrily took in every small detail of Hermione's figure. She really was beautiful. She just didn't believe it herself. And she looked about ready to kill someone violently and painfully. A grin crept upon his face.

_Mission: Get Hermione to have fun at the ball, for once in her life._

_

* * *

Okay... well there's your 11 page chapter, hope you liked it... Review Please!  
and just if you wanted to know, there will probably only be 2 chapters after this... so sad... :(_

_**Cactus0**- thanks so much and yeah, I despise dress shopping too  
_

_**Ladel**- thanks for reading my entire story on Friday and reviewing to every single chapter... My inbox was very happy _

_And thanks to everyone who reviewed because you guys helped me write out this chapter faster. Uh... yeah I think that just about covers it...Next Chapter is the Ball! Wheeeeee... finally...so Review please... it will also be a long chapter, and I probably won't have it updated until at least next weekend_

_-Oli _


	27. The Ball part 1

_Finally done typing this chapter! sorry you guys had to wait... this is another 11-pager... and I couldn't even fit in the whole ball... so there will be quite a few more chapters! yay! and sorry if I have a bit of typos, I kindof rushed this... you'd rather have this today than thursday right? yup, thought so... okay then enjoy! (and review!) _

_ **Disclaimer: Nope!**_

_Random Latin Quote of the Day: Recedite, plebes! Gero rem imperialem!_

_Stand aside plebians! I am on imperial business!_

_

* * *

_

Chapter 27

The Ball: part 1

The Stars say "Manly"

As George, Hermione, Harry and Ginny reached the girls' staircase, Harry conveniently forgot about its rather annoying tendency to turn into a slide, and flew haphazardly down into the common room, much to the amusement of his housemates. He fixed his shattered glasses (hey, that happens when you do a face plant down a jinxed slide) with a quick, "reparo," and grinned weakly.

George shrugged, "Aw, what the heck!" he glanced wickedly at his date before swiping her knees from under her and scooping up the shrieking girl.

"George! What _do_ you think you're doing! Put me down _this instant_!" Hermione struggled frantically.

But George held her tight, grinned, and with a running leap, hurled himself down the precarious slide with a thrashing Hermione on his lap. She finally managed to break free of the Weasley's grasp and grinned as the slide turned back into stairs under her feet. George tumbled down the last few stairs quite painfully.

Hermione herself, had latched onto the banister for balance, and now descended the remaining stairs, laughing uncontrollably.

Ginny smiled and shook her head at their horseplay, before stepping elegantly down the stairs and taking Harry's hand in her own.

George rolled over and sat up, rubbing the places he'd bounced off the steps.

"I will have my revenge!" he bellowed loudly as he stood up.

He grabbed Hermione's shoulder for support, "As soon as my ass stops hurting."

0o0o0o0o

Harry and Ginny walked closely together towards the portrait, followed by a stumbling Hermione and a limping George, although both were laughing their guts out.

"Sorry folks!" George waved in a creepily Lockhart-like manner to the audience they had attracted, as they stepped somewhat ungracefully through the portrait, " But the ball awaits us!"

0o0o0o0o

Their walk to the Great Hall was a fairly normal one, at least until they got to the first winding stairwell…

Hermione and George led the small party, Hermione clutching both the banister and George's arm as she inched her way down, in the slightly taller heels.

"Wanna speed it up a bit?" Ginny suggested after the fourteenth stair.

"I told you Ginny! I'll fall, break my ankles, and crack open my skull. It's your own fault for changing my shoes!" Hermione teetered warily down another step.

"Oh screw it!" George yelled impatiently, "Revenge Time!"

He grasped Hermione firmly about the waist and threw her over his shoulder like a sack of potatoes. Surprisingly, she did not put up much of a fight (A/N: well, if she did, I'd have to go into the whole falling, ankle breaking, skull cracking thing again).

When they reached the bottom, Hermione smirked slightly, "I suppose your butt stopped hurting then?"

"You do realize, if I said no," George joked pleasantly, "you'd be in the perfect position to kiss it better for me?"

"Hate to break it to you George, but I can assure you that won't happen… Wanna put me down now?"

"Nope!" George laughed, "That would be ungentlemanly of me! Making the poor young lass tread upon the cold dusty floor? Tisk tisk."

"Harry and Ginny don't seem to have a problem with that," Hermione pointed out, a smile creeping onto her face.

"Oi! Harry!" George shouted, "Stop being so ungentlemanly! Ginny shouldn't have to dirty the bottoms of such exquisite shoes!"

"Nor should Hermione be forced to stare at your ass!" Harry shot back, grinning.

George put an extremely offended look upon his face, "She's not being forced, are you my sweet?"

"Nope," Hermione answered sarcastically, "That's exactly why I'm dangling off your shoulder feeling like I'm about to barf."

"Well, there you go!" George turned back to Harry, "told you!"

"Much as I love the view George, could you let me down now?" Hermione asked mildly.

"Just one more flight of stairs, love!" George assured her cheerfully, "I _did_ tell you I'd have my revenge!"

They bounced wildly down the stairs and George placed a somewhat queasy Hermione gently in front of the Great Hall.

0o0o0o0o

Ginny rushed excitedly into the dimly-lit Hall, dragging Harry carelessly behind her. George waited a moment for Hermione to get her bearings before asking, "Shall we?"

Hermione looked doubtfully up at him, "I suppose… but no more revenge," she warned.

George pretended to ponder for a moment, "Alright then, but only for you."

He took her hand and she reluctantly allowed him to lead her into the Hall.

Hermione gasped, the Great Hall was simply amazing. Sure, she and Winky had done a decent job putting up the decorations, but it all just seemed so much more beautiful in the semi-darkness of dusk.

Soft moonlight poured in through the magical glass ceiling, delicately sparkling among crystal-clear icicles and bathing the dance floor in a pure white glow. Tiny flames danced from within many-faceted votives, casting fragments of light upon the tables on which they stood.

A calm melody played from the low stage where a quartet clad in artfully destroyed robes played. Both elf and human faces were scattered about the Hall; Dumbledore having invited the elves to join them this year.

0o0o0o0o

"I will not dance with you!"

"Yes, you is!"

"I won't!"

"You is having no choice!"

"Why's that?"

"My family is being very powerful, and we is being betrothed! You is having to!"

"I am betrothed to Draco Malfoy, a human. You are just a silly purple elf!"

"I is not a silly purple elf! I is Draco Malfoy! And you is having to be obeying me!"

Pansy stuck her tongue out stubbornly at the silly purple elf and latched herself onto the arm of a smirking Montague.

"You is coming back here's right nows!" Draco screamed shrilly to their retreating forms, "Traitor! Mugglelover! Offsprings of a,"

"Silencio!" Montague waved his wand carelessly behind him.

The silly purple elf's mouth snapped shut and he began to punch and kick at the floor (and any unwary passersby) in his fury. His tantrum continued wildly until Grimmy and Gribby stepped forward to escort him sternly to a secluded corner.

0o0o0o0o

"Hermione! Dance with me!" George cried jubilantly as the quartet struck up a merry, lighthearted tune.

"No… I can't," she faltered slightly.

"Why not? It'll be fun! Come on! I promise!" George cajoled, smiling endearingly.

"I… can't dance," she admitted softly.

Truly, she did want to be out there on the dance floor with George, happy and carefree. But she'd only make a fool of herself, just like last time, and especially in these shoes.

"That's okay!" George reassured her, "I can't either!"

He pulled the reluctant girl into the midst of rhythmically swaying bodies. A few mere minutes later, George had Hermione spinning wildly, giddy with sheer exhilaration. Their "unique" dance moves had warded away many other couples, and they now possessed a five foot circle of clear dance floor.

Hermione's heel had already maimed an eye, a nose, a shin and a crotch, and no one much fancied being the next victim of her shoes' assault. So, as the pair skipped unorthodoxly dosido-fashion down the floor, the crowd parted quickly out of range of Hermione's footwear.

After incorporating a few muggle disco moves, George lifted a hysterically laughing Hermione and twirled madly about, pointing his toes like a ballerina.

Tears of laughter pricked the edges of Hermione's eyes as colors blurred past her. The only thing she could clearly see was George's grinning face, arms wrapped securely around her, making sure she did not fall. She clutched his neck tightly as they began pirouetting faster at a dizzying speed.

She had to admit, George didn't lie. This really was fun. People were probably staring and whispering, but she found that for the first time, she really couldn't care less. Flashes of pink, maroon, silver, whizzed past. It was just her and George right now. Nothing else mattered. He had shown her a new path within life… and she absolutely loved it.

As George leapt about, her arm bounced against a small lump in his breast-pocket, not much bigger that the muggle AA-batteries she used to stick in flashlights when her family went camping.

… _Speaking of new paths…_

She drew the tiny container out slowly, making sure George didn't notice. A small label stuck to the side read, **WWW Poodle Head Potion**.

… _perfect…_

As the song ended, Hermione's unsteady feet touched the ground once more, and she excused herself, wobbling precariously over to the large, food-laden table. She glanced over at Ron, then mischievously towards the huge crystal punch bowl. Uncorking the tiny container she had snitched from George's pocket, she walked over to a glum looking Ron, as if to go say hi. As she neared him, she pretended to trip over the protruding table leg and grabbed for the punch bowl to steady herself, neatly sloshing the potion into the red juice.

"Stupid heels," she muttered loudly, as she vanished the container with a subtle flick of her wand, "So, how're you doing?" Hermione asked Ron.

Ron gestured sadly to a circular table where Lavender sat… with and elf… and ugly elf.

"Even when he's an elf, she prefers him over me,"

"Erm…. 'scuse me for asking, but who's he?" Hermione squinted over at the scrawny elf.

"Dean Thomas," Ron growled in the back of his throat.

"Don't worry Ron," Hermione consoled halfheartedly, "I'm sure you'll find someone better than her. Did you know she and Parvati used to go around pestering Harry to let them give him a makeover?"

"Really now?" Ron smirked, "Ol' Harry never did tell me about that episode. Maybe you're right, I don't really want someone who'll be trying that on me. Well, thanks Herms, I think I'll go find someone to replace Lavender now." He left and strode purposefully over to a cluster of girls by the doorway.

"Ron!" Hermione called.

"What?"

"Don't call me Herms!"

"Fine."

… _That was ridiculously easy, in all aspects…_

Hermione made her way back to George, who grinned knowingly, "Hermione," he teased, placing his face extremely close to hers, "I think I'm having a bad influence on you."

"What? Why's that?" she asked, blinking innocently.

"Oh don't pretend you don't know," he smiled mysteriously.

"Don't pretend I don't know what?"

"Don't pretend you don't know that I know what you know,"

"Don't pretend that I don't know that you know what I know what?"

"Don't pretend that you don't know that I know that you know I know what you know!"

"Don't pretend that I don't know that you know--," Hermione was silenced by a finger upon her lips.

"Don't pretend you don't know that I saw you take the potion, and I saw you spike the punch," George finished.

"But I'm not pretending, that I didn't know that you knew what--,"

"Don't start," George interrupted, "Merlin knows I'm confused enough already. You spiked the punch, simple as that."

"Alright, I admit, I did… And what are you going to do about it," she challenged in a playfully honeyed tone.

"Well," he feigned contemplation, "I'm afraid you'll have to be… punished."

A tiny hint of alarm trembled through Hermione's body as George's arms pinned her own to her sides.

…_What exactly does he mean by punishment?..._

Soon though, he closed the space between them and all traces of fear evaporated as his lips came upon hers.

"George?" Hermione whispered, after they had finally parted.

"Yeah?"

"You suck at choosing punishments."

0o0o0o0o0o

Little over half and hour later, an argument burst out between two Elvin idiots.

"I is being the manlier!" Dean proclaimed.

"No! I is!" Draco insisted.

"You is not! You is being purple!" Dean scorned, "You is a silly purple elf! Even you's girlfriend is saying so!"

"At least I is having one!" Draco retorted.

"I is having one, right LavLav?"

The aforementioned batted her eyelashes and purred, "Of course Dean! You're so cute!"

"Well," Draco squealed challengingly, "my muscles is being bigger than you's!"

"nuh-uh!" Dean responded shrilly, "Be proving it then!"

Draco whisked up his sleeve and flexed a bony arm, "Ha! See if yous can be beating that!"

Dean rolled up his own sleeve in what was intended to be an extremely macho display, but in reality, only made him look constipated. He flexed his scrawny arm and it trembled violently with effort.

"Seeing? My arm even is being shaky with manliness! I is reeking of manliness! Is you hearing what the stars is saying?" Dean gestured to the ceiling, "They is saying manly, manly, manly, manly! Because Deany is being a manly man!"

"You is a elf, not man! And stars is being for females!"

"Fine! I is a elf-man then. But so is you!"

"There is being just one way to be settling this," Draco hissed.

0o0o

"Hey, Lavender! Psst!" Katie poked the dreamy-eyed girl sharply.

"What?"

"What are those two elves doing? And why's that one purple?"

"Oh, that's Dean, and the purple one is Malfoy. They're comparing their masculinity." Lavender returned to staring fondly at Dean.

Katie stumbled away disgusted.

… _ewww, I did so not hear that… no dirty thoughts now Katie… deep breaths…_

0o0o

"DRINKING CONTEST!" the two elves bellowed in unison.

Dumbledore seemed to materialize from nowhere before them.

"Of course," he smiled slightly behind half-moon spectacles, "The Hogwarts rules state that no alcoholic beverages will be permitted on the premises. Feel free, however, to use the punch."

With a twirl of his wand and a brisk, "Accio," the crystal punch bowl zoomed over to slosh between Dean and Draco.

Dumbledore's eyes twinkled with merriment as he conjured up two ridiculously long drinking straws, "May the best man win," he said amiably, before gliding off towards professor McGonagall.

The elves' eyes locked, glittering dangerously.

"Rules…" Dean prompted in a steely (choking wildebeest-like) voice.

"Winner is being last one still standing," Draco replied coolly.

"Ready?"

"Set."

"Go!"

The elves immediately plunked their straws into the huge punch bowl and sucked furiously, all the while glaring defiantly at each other.

Three second passed, then eight, then twelve. Suddenly the bitter rivals were cast into a suffocating cloud of grayish-purple powder. The elves both fell into choking fits, abandoning their contest and fleeing to open air.

From within the thickening dust cloud, burst Dean and Draco, panting and barking wildly. (Barking you ask? Yes. Barking) Draco shook himself in an animalistic manner, before bending down to hover near Dean's backside.

Both Dean and Draco still had their enormous elf-ears, but now they also sported poodle-like faces complete with the fluffy fur (Draco's was a pale purple). Their bodies were still those of elves, although each had a thin tail with a poufy ball of fur at the tip, protruding from the seats of their pants.

A camera flashed, but went mostly unnoticed as the entire hall had become silent to watch the manly, poodle-headed, elves.

As quickly as the Hall had reached utter silence, it descended once more into a raucous chaos, as the poodle elf-men began barking/snapping/attacking/howling/biting/clawing/fighting/basically trying to kill each other, their masculinity contest clearly not forgotten. Or perhaps Dean's rear end just did not happen to smell very good.

0o0o

"George?" Hermione asked.

"Yup?"

"How long does that potion last for exactly?"

"Oh, they'll turn back any minute now," the redheaded Weasley twin delightedly snapped another picture of the tussling poodle-elves.

As the words left his mouth, the fur shed cleanly off the battling… "things", and they stood, dazed, confused, bleeding and… human again, well almost.

They had both kept their poodle tails (bald, shiny, hairless poodle tails) and although they now lacked the familiar elf ears, their ears were still decidedly larger than normal and pointed slightly at the tips. Oh yeah, and Draco was still purple.

"George, that wasn't a prototype, was it?" Hermione asked somewhat disapprovingly.

"Of course not!" George assured her, "It just has a few side effects when mixed with other potion. For example, Dean and Malfoy were both still affected by the house elf potion, therefore, when they were dosed with the poodle-head-potion, they kept certain aspects of both potions. When two potions such as those are mixed, you never do know what'll happen."

"It's not permanent though… right?"

"Yup! It is!" George burst out laughing, "least, I think it is!"

"It's not funny! You need to change them back!"

"Yes it is! I couldn't think of any other people who deserve it more. And why should I try to change them back?"

"Well, you turned them into whatever-they-are!"

"Nuh-uh! You did! You spiked the drinks! Both Times!"

Hermione let out a small , "oh," and shuffled over to the now bickering somewhat-humans.

"Erm… if we could just calm down a bit," Hermione began, "I'm sure we--,"

"SHUT UP!" came the simultaneous response, and the bickering continued.

"Hmph," Hermione stalked back to George, "I think, maybe they do deserve that then."

"I am having a bad influence on you," George whistled in amazement.

* * *

_Well, there you go then! hope you liked it! there will be a little hospital wing intermission, and then part two of the ball... and then later, christmas holidays and stuff. so I would estimate, at least 4-5 more chapters... I didn't realize til now how long these chapters would be! well , REVIEW PLEASE!_

_and I'll try to update soon!  
-oli (wouldn't it be sad if I made a typo and spelled "oil" instead? lol- i actually have done that in emails before) _


	28. Not a CandyShop

_Hello again everyone! sorry for not updating as soon as I'm sure you'd all like me to... I had to do a lab for science and it was really hard and took forever... so yeah, I've got excuses... _

_and I know this chapter is really short, but I feel sorta justified in posting it since the last one was so long, as will be the upcoming one... soooo sorry bout that also:)_

_Oh and if you're bored or whatever, I wrote a little oneshot like last week. It's Remus/Tonks and sortof sad... but I'd greatly appreciate if you guys would go read and review! lol_

_Random Latin Quote o' the Day: vacca foeda (stupid cow) _

_**Disclaimer: still no**_

_Rightiothen! on with the story! dont kill me over it's shortness, and Happy St. Patty's Day! _

_

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_  
Chapter 28

Not a Candy-shop

"Well, Dumbledore cut in, "I suggest you two go visit Madam Pomfrey. And also…_cough_… you may wish to change your outfits… _cough cough_...

The somewhat humans looked down, and to their absolute horror, saw that their trousers had shrunken to skin tight Speedos, and their shirts now rose above their midriffs.

Draco screamed shrilly (even though he wasn't an elf anymore and now had his "manly" vocal chords back) and sprinted (somewhat painfully) out of the hall, followed closely by Dean. Loud rips echoed off the corridor walls and the school erupted into fits of laughter as Dean doubled back to retrieve his trousers, which had torn cleanly off his body.

0o0o0o

"Well, Mr. Thomas," Madam Pomfrey tutted, "I do believe we shall be able to remove all but an inch of this tail. Mr. Malfoy however," she turned towards Draco, "You shall not be so lucky."

"What?" Draco bellowed, "That's not fair! Why not?"

"You, Mr. Malfoy, have an abnormally large blood vessel wrapped around the middle of your tail. If I were to remove the entire limb, you would suffer severe repercussions, and quite probably death." Madam Pomfrey responded.

"Well, are you a witch or not? Fix it!" Draco demanded.

"Magic has its limits, silly boy," she snapped, "next time, look before you drink."

"There has to be an antidote!" he screamed, "I'm a purple frickin _thing_ with a bald tail!"

"You'd best get better acquainted with that tail Mr. Malfoy, as it will be there for the rest of your life. I do however, have something which will lessen your purple hue somewhat."

She handed him a tall beaker of smoking, acid-green liquid. Draco took an overly trusting gulp of the stuff, and immediately spewed it right back out.

"This is positively vile!" he spat in disgust.

"I distribute medicines, Mr. Malfoy, not candy!"

* * *

_Review Please!_

_-oli _


	29. The Ball part 2

_Hey everyone!  
_

_here's part 2 to the ball, and enjoy! Oh and sorry about all my attempted symbolism... ummm, I blame... Mr. Yacyk! (symbolism/big-word-obsessed english teacher from last year)_

_Oh and this chapter is loosely based on a real story... (if you're curious ask, otherwise I won't bore you with my life) _

**Disclaimer: no, no, no and again... NO**

_This chapter is dedicated to Christine if she ever reads this, and her squeaky mice... because I said so (right, don't ask)  
_

_Random Latin Quote of the Day: Estne volumen in toga, an solum tibi libet me videre? (Is that a scroll in your toga, or are you just happy to see me?) _

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Chapter 29 

The Ball: Part 2

Finding Doubt within Desire

George pulled Hermione back onto the dance floor for what would be their last time that night. The hall had grown darker, although the silvery white moon still hung unmoving amidst thousands of stars in the night sky above. Candles now floated above the many bodies, adding to the dapped moonlight.

George's hands encircled Hermione's small waist as the music began to play; a soft, slow, lovingly played piece. Hermione laced her fingers behind George's neck as they slowly began to move.

"Hey," George's breath tickled her ear, "I think we may actually be getting the hang of this whole dancing thing… People aren't running away so much anymore."

"Key words…" Hermione whispered back, smiling sleepily, "…so much."

His large hand trailed lightly up her back, lending a warm sensation to the bare skin it touched. She jerked in surprise and looked up at him, searching his face for some kind of explanation. She found no answers, only warmth, and yet more questions. She didn't like questions she couldn't find answers for, but she immersed herself in his deep pools of blue and felt herself losing grip; drowning in their eternity. And she wanted nothing more at this particular moment than exactly that.

Yet with such sudden emotion, also sown are the seeds of doubt; scattered like grass seed in a flower garden. Left to their own devices, they will take root and multiply, choking out delicate stems. Only the devoted gardener can hope to weed out the headstrong plants, leaving the garden once more, to nurture the weaker, but most rewarding specimens.

Such was Hermione's mind, suddenly strangled in the twisting thick roots of uncertainty. She surely felt something welling up inside her heart, pining constantly for George, but she didn't know what it was; couldn't categorize or define it. A question lacking an answer. A feeling different than anything she'd ever felt before, and it terrified her.

She, the first in class to raise her hand, the only one whose exam result read nothing but "O" for outstanding, the brains behind every of Harry Potter's accomplishments, the witch who could always find a solution to everything…. Could not find the proper definition for this.

This feeling was unknown, like a dark shadow lurking in a corner, withdrawn, but near enough to strike. It could not be trusted. She could not coax it out into the revealing light of day, and therefore she must avoid it. Flee back to the comfortable world of known, where everything could be solved with a trip to the library, where she had lived all her life. This unsolvable problem loomed over her, and clouded her once clear mind.

Hermione's spine stiffened under George's tender touch and the song ended. She dropped her hands from behind his neck as if burned, and gave in to her misguided logic's demands. She fled, quickly and without warning, leaving George torn and confused. He paused for a lost moment before swiftly chasing after.

0o0o0o0o0o

Hermione tore through the throngs of happy couples as primal instinct took over where her twisted logic had left off. She caught a brief glimpse of Ron with a pretty brunette witch, earthy green material flowing gracefully about, adorned with so many dainty flowers.

_Hannah Abbot?_

She dismissed the thought almost immediately from her mind. She must escape. She ran faster, nearly tripping over clumsy heels and dress hem, and finally pushing open the great wooden doors to exit the castle.

Still she ran, unmindful of the foot-high snow and swirling eddies of chilly air. Her body became immune to the searing cold, instantly numbing her bare limbs. A shoe caught on a stray pebble and she tripped. Forcefully, she kicked off the offending she along with its mate and continued her fierce sprint, bare feet thrashing flurries of pure white snow into the icy air.

With every stride, her burdens grew less, and she quickly gained momentum, now unhindered by doubt and the discarded shoes, cutting cleanly through gales of cold, her fears and reason left far behind. She laughed maniacally, and tossed her hair out of her eyes, the dropping temperature only energizing her.

Finally she slowed, overcome with sudden exhaustion, stopping shakily in front of the frozen lake. The wild, elated sensation had drained from her body, but still she remained in an almost dreamlike trance. She climbed atop a huge boulder, her boulder, and sat on a worn spot devoid of wet snow. She stared upwards, towards the heavens, slipping in and out of reality, losing herself this time in the glittering multitudes. She gasped raggedly, poufs of vapor dissipating before flushed cheeks while the frigid gusts of wind sent goose bumps racing down her spine. But she sat, unnoticing, uncaring, unthinking.

0o0o0o0o0o

George sprinted quickly through the deep snow, following Hermione's footprints. Why had she run? Was it something he did? He tripped and looked behind him. Hermione's shoes lay abandoned, half buried in white.

_She went barefoot in this snow?_

He grabbed them and hurried on his way, head turned down toward the tracks, focused completely on his goal like a trusty bloodhound. The path of churned up snow eventually led to a large moonlit boulder, and upon it, Hermione, silhouetted perfectly against the full moon. He scrambled cautiously up the icy rock to where she sat, bathed in moon-glow, but blue with cold.

"Hermione," he whispered softly.

She seemed not to hear him or notice his presence, still gazing glassy-eyed up at the darkened sky.

"Hermione," he persisted, placing his palm over her hand.

It was cold as ice, and no wonder. She had run into outside wearing only her thin, sleeveless, halter tied dress.

"Hermione, c'mon. We have to get you back to the castle. You'll freeze to death out here," George pleaded and shook her roughly. He grabbed his wand from his back pocket to cast a warming charm.

And it turned into a squeaky rubber mouse.

"Oh Bloody Hell NO!" he cursed up at the stars winking innocently back at him.

He was stuck on a rock with a half-conscious Hermione, her shoes, and a squeaky rubber mouse instead of a wand. George angrily chucked the mouse at the lake and watched as it bounced and skidded over the ice. After a few moments, a massive tentacle cracked through the thick sheet of frozen water and snatched the squeaky rubber toy. George turned his attention back to Hermione. He needed to get her back inside, and fast.

He scooped up her limp form and slid tentatively from the giant boulder, leaving the shoes, as his hands were already quite full. Loping as quickly as he could with the added weight, George began the long run back up to the castle. His limbs burned from running and carrying Hermione, and the fierce winds threatened to bury them alive. His leaden legs swung tiredly in a dull, but steady gait. Finally, the wooden entry doors welcomed him, promising warmth and rest.

He slowed and made his way to the hospital wing, music echoing off the corridor walls. The ball was not yet over.

Bursting into the hospital wing, he deposited Hermione onto a bed fitted with starched white sheets, and sunk into a nearby chair, fatigue and soreness washing over him.

"What's happened now?" Madam Pomfrey interrogated sternly as she bustled over. She checked Hermione's pulse expertly before casting a drying spell over both her and George. "Why weren't you two in the Great Hall with the rest?"

"I dunno," George mumbled blearily, "She ran outside… and I followed."

"Oh, that shouldn't be too much of a problem, so long as this does not become a habit," she noted briskly, "nothing a little Pepper-up won't solve."

She poured two tall beakers of smoking red potion, handing one to George. The other, she tipped down Hermione's throat. The aforementioned sputtered and gagged on the burning liquid before warily sitting up.

"How'd I get here?" she asked confusedly.

"Mr. Weasley brought you," Madam Pomfrey answered for George, "You should count yourself lucky Miss Granger. A few hours in that cold could kill you."

Hermione blushed and averted her eyes to her sheets, "thanks," she whispered quietly to George, "sorry for running out on you like that."

"It's fine," he assured her as he downed the last of his potion, immediately warmed and invigorated. "Can we go now?" he asked Madam Pomfrey.

"I suppose so," she finally conceded after a long pause, "Just don't go out there in this weather anymore."

"Right. Thanks!" George responded quickly, suddenly eager to leave the hospital wing.

He helped Hermione down from the bed and they left in a somewhat awkward silence.

They turned the corner, and came face to face with Snape. He was currently in "super stealthy spy mode", attempting to blend into the shadows. Unfortunately for him, merrily burning bright torches were hung on the walls nearly every couple yards.

George clapped a large hand over Hermione's eyes as the potions professor froze like a deer before headlights. He was wearing nothing but a very small pair of silk black and glittery green boxers.

George stared fixedly at a small crack in the ceiling, "Sorry professor, but if you don't mind, I'd rather like to keep my eyesight."

Snape sputtered wildly in rage before shouting, "20 points from Gryf-,"

"You can't dock points anymore!" George laughed, arms wrapped around Hermione, hand still firmly over her eyes, "I'm not a student anymore!"

As if to prove his point, George turned for a brief second to snap a blinding, purple dots inducing photo. Snape screeched wildly like a wounded wildebeest and scuttled away cursing something that sounded oddly like, "these were my $#!ing favorites too!"

"Well at least that wasn't weird," Hermione commented, peeling George's hand from her face.

"Speak for yourself," he groaned as they approached the large fireplace. The music no longer resounded from the hall and the ball was probably reaching its end.

"Well, after you," George offered a small drawstring bag full of fine gray powder to Hermione.

"What?" she asked, confused.

"Oh, Ginny didn't tell you? Mum figured your parents were off skiing like they usually do and invited you and Harry over for the holidays. Ginny already sent your things over this morning."

"Oh, alright!" Hermione shrugged happily and grabbed a fistful of Floo Powder, "but George?"

"yeah?"

"Could you… maybe not… tell the others about what happened? It's sort of the second time and I don't want them to worry."

"Wait, this is the second time… What was the first?"

"Well… my uncle died and we were really close. I was during spring break and they didn't find me for about two days… You won't tell will you?"

"no… I won't"

"Thanks," she stepped into the fireplace and dropped the powder, "see you in a bit… The Burrow!"

George watched her go, green flames whipping violently around her form, causing her to flicker and disappear into the dizzying tongues.

* * *

_Hope you all liked... now review please!_

_(and let's not get into that argument over whether the button is blue/periwinkle/purple/rectangular/whatever again... just click the button)_

_til next time!  
-oli _


	30. Christmas with the Weasley's

_Alright.. I just want to say I'm really sorry I haven't updated in so long... I've been really busy lately.. first spring break and then a lot of homework.. And a little bit of writer's block .. but I'm back.. and hopefully you'll like the chapter... _

**Disclaimer: Yes!... oh wait, I'm not allowed to say that? ok then... NO (happy now?)**

Random Latin Quote: _draco dormiens nunquam titillandus_ (never tickle a sleeping dragon-- its the motto of Hogwarts)

_and now, on to the story!_

_

* * *

_Chapter 30

**Christmas with the Weasley's **

"Merry Christmas!" Ginny yelled as she bounced onto the bed where Hermione lay, "Wake up!"

"Morning to you too Ginny," Hermione's eyes opened blearily to the bright redhead.

"Come on! Presents! Everyone's probably already up!" she dragged her protesting friend out of bed and down the stairs.

Hermione, still not fully awake, stumbled recklessly in her loosely-fitted blue plaid pajama bottoms after Ginny. They walked into the living room just as the long parade of Weasley boys (plus Harry) did. A few minutes later, Mrs. Weasley and a yawning Mr. Weasley entered and the frenzied present opening began.

Everyone received the customary knitted sweater from Mrs. Weasley and piles upon piles of candy were being exchanged.

"Ohmygosh Harry! It's beautiful!" Ginny squealed as she unwrapped an emerald studded silver chain necklace. Harry blushed a deep crimson as she rushed over and kissed him squarely on the mouth.

Meanwhile, Mr. Weasley was opening a battery powered flashlight from Hermione.

"See, Mr. Weasley, you just push this button and the light comes on," she instructed patiently.

He pressed the button and dropped the flashlight in surprise as the bright light clicked on.

"Ingenious," he murmured, picking it up and alternating between turning it on and off.

"Oi! Bill!" Fred shouted from across the room, "you trying to make us your clones or something?"

He and George had both received a matching fang earring, similar to that which their older brother always wore. Bill laughed and showed them the spell to put a painless hole in their earlobes.

"Don't worry," he assured a glaring Mrs. Weasley, "It's reversible, and it only works on ears." (at this point, the twins were futilely attempting to pierce different parts of their bodies)

"Look! I'm Bill!" George's fang dangled ridiculously off his ear.

"No, I am!" Fred shouted, batting at his own large fang.

"No you're not! I am!" George sniffed daintily in feigned haughtiness as he propped his fists cheerleader style on his hips.

"Maybe this wasn't such a great idea," Bill muttered to himself, watching his brothers do increasingly more interesting imitations of him.

The present opening continued until only a few more presents remained.

"Here Hermione," George handed over a brightly wrapped package, "this is for you."

"Oh, thanks!" she smiled, "but you have to open yours first!" she pointed to the package by his knee.

"Okay!" George ripped the paper off wildly, chucking crumpled pieces over his shoulder. He pulled out a tie; A plain black tie.

"Oh, ermm… thanks Hermione…" the disappointment showed clearly in his voice, regardless of how he tried to conceal it.

… _bet he thinks its just a stupid old tie…_ (Hermione thought smugly).

"Put it on!" she insisted, ignoring his expression.

"Okay.. I guess.." George tied the tie around his neck and looked back at Hermione in confusion.

… _Why'd she get me a tie? This is something Percy'd wear…_

The tie flashed from a dull black to a bright orange with large blue polka dots. Hermione grinned at his expression.

"Whoa!" yelled George, taken aback by the sudden change in color, then, "Where'd you get this? I've never seen anything like it,"

"I made it," Hermione said proudly, "It reflects your personality and mood.. and also something else…"

"What?"

"Think of something see-through…"

"huh?

"umm… like glass, or ice, or air or something."

George closed his eyes, deep in concentration and suddenly, was not there.

"Bloody hell, I'm invisible!" his voice came seemingly from nowhere, "Hey Fred! Just imagine how many pranks we'll be able to pull off now! And Harry, you've got competition now, because this is way cooler than that ratty old cloak! Watch out everyone, for it is George, and his tie of invisibility!"

Everyone laughed at his obvious pleasure. A second later, George popped back to visibility, right in front of Ron, who jumped about a foot in surprise.

"Alright, you're turn now!" George bounded over, pushing the box into Hermione's hands.

She carefully unwrapped it, peeling off the tape, then folding the paper neatly for future use. Meanwhile, George was fidgeting impatiently, his tie flickering the colors of the rainbow as Hermione slowly opened the box.

She pulled from it, a thin blue book entitled in silvery script, "**_10 Reasons Why You Should Be My Girlfriend." _**

Hermione blushed at the wide array of expressions upon the Weasley family's faces. Charlie's was shocked. Ginny's was knowing. Mrs. Weasley's was delighted, and George's own was filled with an endearing hopeful look. Everyone's attention was now focused on herself, George, and the scrapbook. Her thoughts raced, but nevertheless, she opened the book.

The title page read only, in the same silvery script, "**_Written for Hermione, by George_**."

With a shaking hand, she turned the page and read aloud to her hushed audience, **_"One. You're practically family anyway." _**Above this silver line was pasted a photograph. She smiled in the middle of it, surrounded by the family of redheads and also Harry. Hermione looked from the picture, up at George, who nodded for her to continue.

She turned the next page, furnished with a gross looking picture of Draco the elf with a plunger, dirty yellow gloves, and a shower cap, "**_Two. We both despise Malfoy_**," she laughed weakly.

"it's true," George shrugged, his tie suddenly emblazoned with the logo, "Malfoy SUCKS! Alot!"

Ginny nudged Hermione to keep reading, "**_Three. I've already taught you the fine art of drink spiking," _**she read, looking at the picture George had taken of her tripping at the Ball to spill the poodle head potion into the punch bowl.

"Was I really that obvious?" Hermione asked in dismay, watching the picture replay itself over and over again.

"Nah," George replied, "but nothing escapes the eye of the king of pranksters!"

"Hey!" protested Fred, "I'm the king!"

"No you're not! You can be the Queen or Prince or a lowly subject or something, but I am definitely the King!" George argued.

"Why do you get to be King?" Fred demanded.

"Because I'm--,"

"SHUT UP!" Ginny bellowed, "Just let her finish!"

Hermione glanced up at them, amusement twinkling in her eyes. She turned back to the thin scrapbook, "**_Four. I'll always take care of you_**," she touched a picture of herself in George's arms, outside. Snow whirled around, but he loped on determinedly. Tears pricked her eyes, but she swiped them quickly away with her sleeve, "Where'd you get these pictures?" she asked George, "this one was from last night wasn't ---," she clamped a hand over her mouth realizing she'd just told everyone exactly what she'd asked George not to.

"It's okay," Ginny reassured her, "We already knew. Ron saw you run off and it's not the first time you've done this. We also knew George would make sure you got back okay."

"Oh." Hermione managed to say in a small voice.

"And Colin's just about as handy as he is annoying," George pointed out, "Most of these pictures were actually ones he took. I stuck nearly half these in just last night."

Hermione slimed a watery smile, watching the picture. After a long moment, she turned the page.

"George!" she shrieked in genuine horror, "Where the bloody hell did you get that!"

Hermione covered the offending photo with both hands.

"Actually, Ginny took it," George offered innocently, shifting the blame, "And was that the first time I've heard you curse?"

"Ginny!" Hermione accused her grinning friend.

"What? You expect me to grow up in the same house as those two and not pick up a few tricks?"

"What're you doing in that picture anyway?" George asked curiously, moving her hands aside.

Hermione blushed. Harry leaned over to see, and started laughing, "Hermione!" he snorted, "You're doing an impression of one of those muggle rock band things!"

"You mean all muggles dance around in their nighties shouting into hairbrushes?" George asked quite seriously.

Hermione blushed harder, "I didn't think anyone was watching," she glared at Ginny, "Much less, taking pictures. And thanks George, but I think I know my own name by now," she glanced at the flowing silver script that read, **_"Five. You're Hermione."_**

She flipped to the next page which read, **_"Six. I'm George."_**

"But I suppose you already knew that too, right?" George grinned cheekily.

Above the caption, was a picture of George repeatedly getting hit in the face with a snowball. Hermione smiled at the fond memory and went on to the next page.

The script now read, **_"Seven. You know you love me."_**

Hermione looked up skeptically at George, "We look ridiculous, you know that right?"

"Of course!" George replied, feigning offense, "and that is my pride, joy and ultimate goal in life."

"I should've known," Hermione smiled, shaking her head at the picture of herself flung like a sack of potatoes over George's shoulder.

"But you'll see that the next page is not so ridiculous," George reached down and turned it, uncovering the shimmering silver headline that read, **_"Eight. I love you."_**

Accompanying this caption was a picture of George at the entrance of the Great Hall, watching Hermione the elf release a jar full of fairies. As the lights whirled around her in the picture, Hermione exclaimed, "So you really were there! I'd thought it was only my imagination!"

George nodded, a faraway look in his eyes.

"You know," Hermione went on, "I could accuse you of being a stalker."

George snapped out of his brief trance and replied contentedly, "I prefer the term, guardian angel."

Hermione shrugged and went on to the next page.

"_**Nine. We love each other."**_

She gasped as she watched the picture. It was the picture of all the Weasley children plus herself and Harry, gathered around the rickety burrow table, sipping steaming mugs of hot chocolate. The George in the picture glanced fleetingly at her, then went back to his drink. In turn, while he was busy with his cocoa, she snuck a peek at him. The secret glances continued until the mugs were just about empty, and Hermione tore her eyes from the photo to look up at George.

"I never realized," she said softly, a tear escaping the corner of her eye.

George brushed it gently away with his thumb, "Neither did I, not until I saw this."

(Fred's smug grin went unnoticed by the others, as his twin and Hermione were otherwise occupied, and everyone else was watching them with fascination as if they were some kind of muggle soap opera.)

Hermione turned the next page, tears now streaming freely down her cheeks.

"**_Ten. It'll be fun."_** She read aloud, smiling in spite of her tears. Dominating the page, was a picture of their first kiss; the kiss that wasn't supposed to mean anything, but did; the kiss in the shop, in front of a gaping Lee Jordan; the kiss of a prankster and his newly acquired apprentice.

More tears cascaded down Hermione's shining face, "I didn't think you meant anything by it," she whispered.

"I didn't know I meant anything by it," George replied, "until now."

He reached down and turned the final page. From the silver script, he read aloud, "Hermione? Will you be my girlfriend? And maybe, in the future, something more?"

After a moment, Hermione replied breathlessly, "yes," her face a mixture of ecstasy, playfulness and tears of pure joy.

And their lips met to the cheers, catcalls and blowing of noses (Mrs. Weasley) of the Weasley family (plus Harry). When the two finally parted, Ginny smirked, "See Hermione? We really are going to be sisters!"

"I'm not married!" Hermione cried out in defense.

"YET!" the Weasley's (including Harry) chorused loudly, grinning collectively.

_0o0o0o0o0o_

And far away, inside the castle of Hogwarts, in the girls' tower of Gryffindor, A rose in a glittering glass vase, burst into full bloom. The velvety petals exploded in a deep, vivid crimson, and all but the very smallest thorns were swiftly shed from the stem. The beginnings of roots sprouted from the end, soaking up clear water. This rose told the tale of happiness gained, and would forever remain in this form and hue.

_**Finis **_(The End)

* * *

_Just to let everyone know, there will be an epilogue... _

_Please Review!_

_-Oli _


	31. epilogue

_And finally, the epilogue... I would like to thank all the wonderful reviewers out there.. you guys are awsome... and now onto the story..._

_Disclaimer: I don't ow_n Harry Potter.. much as I'd like to

_Latin Quote o' the Day: _ Tibi gratias agimus quod mihil fumas (_thank you for not smoking_)

* * *

**Epilogue**

It was a bright, cheery Saturday morning at the Weasley's Wizarding Wheezes shop. Hermione pushed past the crowds of people blocking the entrance and wormed her way up to the cash register where two flustered looking Weasley twins were attempting to subdue their many hordes of customers, all at once. She sidled up behind George, who was currently ringing up the purchases of a particularly rambunctious young first year.

"Need some help?" she whispered near his ear after chastely kissing him on the cheek.

"That'd be great," he smiled weakly in gratitude.

Hermione moved to his right and accio-ed another cash register out onto the counter, causing several people amidst the crown to duck and one to get smacked in the face with the flying metal object. She gestured for the next customer in line to come forward, an eccentric old wizard who looked as if he'd had one too many stings of a billywig.

"And thank you for choosing the Weasley's Wizarding Wheezes," Hermione heard one of the twins recite over the almost deafening chaos inside the small shop.

She took the man's money, two galleons and three sickles, and handed him an overflowing bag of WWW Indestructible Fireworks™.

"Thanks for choosing the Weasley's Wizarding Wheezes," she politely mimicked the twins.

Another customer jostled forward to take the old man's place.

The crowds kept coming, filling the shop until it threatened to burst, and an exhausted Hermione, George and Fred were kept busily punching numbers and handling money.

By non though, the crowds began to disperse and the three were more than ready for a break. They shooed the remaining stragglers out with a, "Shop's closed, we're on lunch break! Come back in an hour or so!" and the store was blissfully empty and silent.

"Hermione, have I told you lately how much I love you?" George asked, after she had chased away a vexingly determined pack of 3rd year Slytherins.

"Actually yes," she answered, "just last night. Or don't you remember?" A smile tugged at her lips as she watched the sunlight play upon the single diamond of the elegant engagement ring on her finger.

"Hey…" Fred whined, "and why wasn't I informed of this?"

"We haven't really told anyone yet," Hermione grinned as she plopped herself down on her fiancé's lap.

"But now you know, so quit complaining," George finished.

Hermione let her eyes wander aimlessly about the shop until they lit upon a strikingly familiar and bloodcurdling image.

"George?" she asked curiously, even though she was almost sure of the answer she'd receive, "You were the one who did that to Snape, after the Ball weren't you?"

"What makes you say that?" he asked slyly.

Hermione bounced off of him and grabbed a medium sized, tall glass bottle, "this."

On the container was a label that read, "Clothes-B-Gone," and a picture of their favourite Potions professor modeling his favourite pair of undergarments.

"Alright, I confess," George pulled her back onto his lap, "But since I did, you have to try a bit."

Hermione slapped him, while Fred snickered, "you wish," she smirked.

The bell on the shop door jingled merrily.

"Go away!" Fred shouted rudely, "We're closed!"

"Well so much for a warm welcome," came Lee's reply.

"Oh, Lee! C'mon in. Sorry, thought you were a customer for a second," Fred clapped him on the back.

"Say, you look oddly cheerful today," George commented lightly, "and who's that bloke behind you?"

"That, my dear hallucination, is Filander Durpsty. He's my shrink, and he's here to prove that you three are all just figments of my imagination."

The wizened old man smoothed down a tuft of white hair idly.

"And why exactly, would we be figments of your imagination?" Hermione demanded calmly.

"Because!" Lee burst out, "I've known Fred and George since first year! And you since your first year! You and George are complete opposites! Add Fred and that's just incest!"

Fred glared and interrupted, "I resent that!"

"Oh don't even bloody go there Fred Weasley. I saw you three in that closet! The real Fred, George and Hermione would never do something like that!"

Filander Durpsty looked amusedly at his client and back at the Weasley's and Hermione.

"So, tell me what you see," he requested of Lee.

Lee glowered, "well, there's two identical redheads with freckles and one witch with bushy brown hair."

"I see," the scrawny old man tapped his chin, "About that, you're not hallucinating. I see the people you describe as clearly as you yourself do. You are simply in a state of denial." He paused while Lee sputtered in disbelief, "Oh and that'll be ten galleons please," He held out a wrinkled hand expectantly. He was paid by a shocked Lee, and left the shop whistling cheerfully.

"I'm in denial?" Lee repeated slowly, "What the bloody hell is that supposed to mean?"

"Well basically," Hermione clarified, "you're screwed."

And with that, George dipped her backwards and planted his lips on hers.

* * *

_And that conludes my little story... I hope you enjoyed it, and I hope you review!_

_For the final time, _

_-oli _


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